I lay awake, listening out for any tiny sound made in preparation for the usual goodnight routine. The clock read 10:28pm, i could never sleep when i knew my father, Simon, wasn’t back and a sleep himself, even if i tried my mind wouldn’t let me, it would just play back all the other nights me and Simon spent together and it sending shivers down my spine.
I heard the front door slam shut, forcing me out from my nightmare day dream and into my nightmare reality and my eyes dart to the clock that said it was 10:30pm, just like him, being spot on. My hearing heightened as i listened closely to his movements downstairs, hoping that he would just shuffle up the steps and into his room to sleep off his drunken state. But I’m not that lucky, God has never looked down on me any other time I’ve been in the depths of hell so i don’t know why he would help me now.
I heard the floor boars start to creak and i froze, holding my breath so that no sound can escape. He finally reaches the top of what seemed like minutes or hours of ascending the stairs until i see the light vanish from under the door, i knew he was standing outside and a tear escapes my eye, burning my checks and i slam my eyes shut thinking i could make everything and everyone vanish and leave me alone. The door knob starts to turn and i quietly whisper a prayer under my breath as fear and panic pump through my veins and i could feel by heart pound against my ribcage, surprised that it didn’t break from the pounding.
Light started to fill the room from the hall way and although my eyes where shut i could sense him standing there. After a moment i heard his footsteps on my bedroom floor as he moved closer to my bed and my hands started to clench into a tight fist, cutting the skin on my palm and blood trickling onto the bed sheets. He loomed over me as he slowly leaned down and crushed me under his muscular body, thanks to his countless hours spent at the gym, if he wasn’t beating me he was beating a punch bag. I felt his hand slide up my legs and i couldn’t keep my breath in any more and began to whimper as more burning tears streamed down my cheeks. I don’t try to fight him anymore, fighting only make it worse and prolong the torture as he pounded into my innocence.
My eyes shot open when i realised the covers had been ripped from the bed and my pajama pants where being slung on the floor followed by my panties. He was grasping my shoulders tight as he positioned himself self between my legs.
“Please” i had whispered, unaware of my mouth being able to move without my command. “I don’t... please don’t” i begged and begged hoping that tonight he would act like a normal, caring father and tuck me in and kiss me goodnight then leave to sleep on his own. Before another word could escape he had tightly gripped my mouth, his nails deepening into my cheeks mixing the blood with my tears as my screams became muted moans.
With his other hand he resumed to slowly stroke up my inner thigh until he reached my now bare vagina. It wasn’t long until the silence was broken with a roar from Simon as he viciously thrust into me. I clenched my fist harder and forcing my nails deeper into my palms, but no pain could distract me from what happening between my legs.
I don’t remember what time i had passed out, but i was grateful that i didn’t have to witness the events of last night through till the end. I sat up to turn my alarm off and winced, it felt as though an elephant was sitting on my stomach. I lifted up my top and saw the reminders of last night, my slender waist covered in bruises making my stomach black, red and blue. Struggling through the pain i turned off the alarm that was telling me its 6:30am and i need to get a ready for another day at school.
I staggered out of bed, stumbling past my discarded covers, pants and underwear to the small bathroom next to my wardrobe. My hand froze as i reached for the door handle as an unfamiliar person looked back at me in the corner of my eye, it was my refection. My averages looks where drowned by the abuse of last night, cheeks red from the possible slapping that might of occurred once i passed out and a little scab on my defined jaw from Simon's deep grasp on my mouth. My voluptuous pink lips a little puffy from the vicious kissing, then my light emerald eyes, what i think my best feature usually pretty and far too big for my slender but curvy, 5ft5 body. They were swollen and red from the overflow of tears i had cried, both awake and unconscious. I shook my head to bring myself back to reality and focus on getting to school.
I got out the shower and started on covering up marks. Although the situation wasn’t ideal i was happy that Simon has learned to only harm me in placed that i can cover up, so my stomach, legs and virtue were the only places he can touch, even if i didn’t want him to touch any part of me at all! As I searched through my wardrobe i took out matching black underwear, short denim shorts with tights and black tank top. I brushed and curled my hair then focused on applying concealer to cover up the marks on my face and a little mascara. Unless i had to cover up the abuse i never really wore much make up, i had naturally clear and pretty face. Not like I’m vain, just the countless stairs and wolf whistles i would receive off fellow classmates confirmed this. I finished by putting on my leather jacket, making sure my bruised wrists were covered also.
As i make my way to last period English, thoughts of before my nightmare life popped into my head and how things used to be happy, well that was before the accident. 6 years ago when I was 11, it was a normal Saturday for the Wilson family. Me and my mum Linda were making our way to the supermarket for food supplies. I remember laughing so hard at my mum singing to the radio in a funny voice and shaking her head around. I awed how she looked and wished that i would grow up to have her big, deep emerald eyes, voluptuous lips that were lit up with a constant smile and sun kissed skin like hers. Although I’ve been told constantly by Simon that i look just like her, my smile could never be as joyful and genuine as hers. I only looked out the window for a moment to view the beautifully blossomed daisies planted alongside the road, thinking about plucking some for my mum because they are our favourite flower when a sudden screech from the tires made my head pop to my mother furiously trying to keep control of the steering wheel. The only time i’ve ever seen her without joy and happiness on her face, as it was replaced by fear and concentration. A split second before we crashed into the upcoming van I felt the pressure on my head, it was my mother’s body blanketing me, saving me from the danger of the collision.
The first bell rang, signalling students to make their way to class. I like to get to class early so that i don’t give people the chance to stair and analyse me. I feel as though their stairs could penetrate my protective layer of anger and cockiness and see the scars from 6 years of abuse by a man that should love and cherish me. I open the door to reveal an empty classroom, with the cliché English Shakespeare posters on the wall and dirty white board behind Mr Schofield’s organised desk. Mr Schofield was my favourite teacher, but that was mostly due to the fact that i loved English and he let us sit wherever we wanted.
I walked to the back of the room and sat in the corner and began to dig out my books for the lesson. Students began to fill the room shortly after, followed by our teacher and the bell to signal that class was starting. I had began to make notes when the volume of gossip and chatting increased, stopping the teacher from continuing the lesson and all eyes where are the door way. My eyes darted over to the sexy man entering the room, making me uncontrollably bite my lip to keep back the lust to jump at him. His long toned body almost filled to door way. He wore a tight plain black top, highlighting his sweet chiseled muscles that hid beneath and wore sexy faded jeans that were slightly slouched on his waste.
My eyes drifted up to his head and my lip pulsed with pain as i bit harder. His short, yet scuffed brown hair looked as though it had been styled just for him and stopped above his eyes. This made his deep blue eyes scream for attention and i felt as though i was getting lost in them.
My daydream was soon rudely interrupted when a few girls let out a tight high pitch scream, making him react by revealing his perfect white pearled teeth smile, making me want to swoon at the sight of it.
“Thank you for finally joining us Mr Edwards, please take a seat” Mr Schofield ordered
“just Jacks fine, Mr S” Jack replied, fully intending on acting like a stuck up snob as he answered back, only making Mr Schofield chuckle and continue to write on the board.
Jack was the captain of the football team, instantly making him the king of school, and the girl staring at him from across the class room his queen, Claire. She was the prettiest girl in all of the school; however that crown was mostly due to the mini outfits she wore, her bleach blond hair, light blue eyes and generous curves. Jack was known as a player and never committed to anyone, but Claire was determined to train him by permanently being attached to his arm. I instantly coughed and forced my head down, i knew that the only seat left available was next to me and i was now in for a bumpy semester.
The bell rang and I took my time with packing away my belongings, i bent down to retrieve my bag and forced everything in while i had my back to Jack and Claire.
“let’s go babes” Clair demanded in her put on, 'cute' baby voice
“babes? Erm no... you go ahead today i think.. i’m a ... go work out tonight” Jack finally said, i could clearly tell he was lying so i giggled, liking how not everyone swooned at the sight of Claire like she thought they did. I turned to find only myself and Jack left in the class room.
“Hay” he said in his seductive deep voice. I swallowed hard and froze in my tracks, this couldn’t be good.
Finally the bell rang for the end of lesson and the girl i had spotted biting her sexy lips whilst staring up at me through her eyelashes got up to pack away. She was warring really short shorts, so when she bent over i felt movement in my pants as my erection built. I was quickly taken from my images of banging this mysterious girl when Claire was leaning on my desk, bringing my attention to her mighty cleavage bulging from her top, but it didn’t have the same effect on me as much as mysterious girl.
“Let’s go babes” she asked, but i was paying no attention. My eyes kept wandering to the girl from the desk next to mine.
“babes? Erm no... you go ahead today i think.. i’m a ... go work out tonight” I had to make a lie up, and it wasn’t helping that the mysterious girl was fixing her shorts that had ridden up slightly when she had bent down. And to top it off she let out a hot giggle sending me over the edge. Now i had to cover my bulging erection with my books and shifting my stance to make the pressure it was putting on my pants more comfortable. Once Claire had left the room i lent against my desk and waited for mystery girl to turn around.
“Hay” She spotted me and froze where she stood. At first I was confused but now i was sure that i could see fear in her eyes. She swallowed hard and suddenly i was filled with sadness and sympathy, all i wanted to do was embrace her in a tight hug and reassure her that everything was ok, i want to protect her. I had never felt this way about any girl before, i had to know who she was.
“My names Jake and you are?” I extended my hand but she just looked at it as if she was learning about human interaction for the first time. My eyebrows pushed together as emotion swept through me. She turned her head away and finally spoke.
“Emma and I know who you are” before i could register a response she was already making her way out the door. I followed her out calling her name, but when she didn’t respond i grabbed her wrist. I saw her whole body tense up and wince just at the touch of my hand. She gaped at me, tears filling her eyes, a response i would expect if i had just stabbed her. Pain started to pump through my body the more i looked into her eyes, the more i saw her vulnerability and the desire to cage her in my arms was at its strongest.
“GET OFF ME!” she screamed, piercing through the quiet empty halls. I quickly released my grip and held my hands up in a defensive response.
As i exited the class room to get away from Jack as quickly as possible, he kept calling my name. I didn’t know what game he was playing so i just ignored him.
I was abruptly stopped when i felt a strong grip around my wrist. I shot my glance at Jack but all i could see was images of Simon and tears started to build up in my eyes.
“GET OFF ME!” I screamed, filling the halls. He quickly released me and lifted his hands into a defensive position in the air to which i took the opportunity to turn and try to escape without anything else being said or done.
“Wait!” he shouted as he ran in front of me, blocking the exit to the stairs with his God like muscular body.
“What do you want?” i asked irritated my his keenness and my annoyingly inappropriate lust for him.
“Emma, as in Emma Wilson?” My eyes shot from the floor to his as anger and fear filled my body, how did he know my name.
“H..how d..do you know my name?” i stuttered still in shock. His eyebrows pushed together deeper as if he was confused about my question.
“I am failing English and was told to ask someone to help tutor me, they told me about you.” He gave me a gentle smile and again i had to bite my lip to resist him. To resist pushing my hand through his hair. His smile grew wider from the satisfaction of my blushing that had spread across my face.
“No, find someone else” i snapped back at him. Angry for my body giving in to his looks. I didn’t like him, i can’t like him, for my protection and his. Realisation sets in and my eyes dart to the closest clock that read 4:20pm, the walk home takes 30 minute from here and Simon was home at 5:00pm. I knew i wasn’t going to make it at this rate. My heart started to race, my palms became sweaty and my throat was dry.
“I am failing English and was told to ask someone to help tutor me, they told me about you.”
I could see anger in her eyes, but that only added petrol to the fire. I wanted her, i needed her. Clearing my throat i gave her a gentle smile. Redness filled her face and now this temptation to rip her clothes off and take her on the floor was too much for me to control. I looked back up at her only to see the fear and panic i had once saw, but never want to see her make ever again, it pained me. She was looking at the clock, was she going to be late for something?
“You ok?” i asked. It took a while for her to snap out of her state of panic and shoot her head to meet mine.
“No, i..i need to b..be somewhere and i’m going to be late so please leave me alone!!” She whispered, barely able to make its way to my ears. I knew i had to help her out, i never wanted to see that pain again.
“If you say yes to tutoring me, i could give you a lift and you’ll be wherever in 10 minutes” Her eyes went soft as she thought about my offer.
“Ok, let me just go to the toilet first.” I was surprised at her sudden agreement, but more so at the fake smile she thought would trick me.
“Ok, let me just go to the toilet first.” I whispered, i knew i had to say something otherwise he would never let me go and the later i was, the more i would bet beaten by Simon’s fist waiting for me at home. I swerved past him and through the doors. I turned the corner so he was now out of view and passed the toilets and i made a break for the doors to my freedom.
When Simon was home for 5:00pm, i had to make sure i got home to start making dinner for him. Only once have i been late before and that was when he snapped and the first time hitting wasn’t just enough.
I barged through the front door, aware that i was late by an hour and hadn’t told Simon that i had joined the English poetry club. I could escape from my horrible life with poetry and it made me feel safe.
As soon as i had shut the front door behind me a strong hand circled around my 14 year old throat and had pushed my back up against the door. His 6ft2, muscular body loomed over me, covering me with his shadow, hiding his more than average looks in the dark. I always thought he could remarry because of the way he looked, and maybe then he would be happy and love me again. He leaned down till his lips were touching my ears. I flinched at the touch but his grasp on my neck only got tighter.
“Where were you? Where you out with a boy?” He whispered into my ear, but as the shiver made its way down my spine i thought that really, he wanted to shout it. I couldn’t answer him, this was the first time he had ever talked to me like this, he was too close.
“ANSWER ME!” he was now shouting and I flinched, squeezing my eyes shut from fear and panic of what was going to happen next.
“N..no i..i was at school..” I finally found my voice
“LIAR!” He had now moved his face only inches from mine.
“No, i...” before i could defend myself he had harshly forced his lips onto mine. One of his hands started to slowly slide up and down my arm.
“No i don’t...owww!” he had bunched me right in the stomach and i doubled over, clutching my stomach.
“GET UP!” he shouted as he grabbed my hair, pulling me to my feet making my stomach hurt all over again. His grasp was now hard on my arms as he pulled me to his lips, they were cold and hard, not what i was expecting my first kiss to be like.
We were gratefully separated by the sound of the house phone echoing throughout the house. He backed away, i was trying to grab as much air as i could to fill my lungs as he looked me up and down then looked to the direction of the ringing. “stay here!” he ordered, i didn’t think i could move. My feet were grounded into the floor as what had just happened haunted me.
Now was my only chance for freedom. I begged my legs to start moving and i headed for the stairs, hearing Simon slam the phone down and his footsteps getting closer into the room. As i reached the landing, Simon had already started on running full speed up the stairs.
“STOP EMMA!” He demanded, now the angriest i had ever seen him.
I ran into my room at the end of the hall and slammed the door shut, hoping that the lock could keep him out. I crawled into the corner, hugging my legs to my chest as hot tears streamed down my cheeks as hard knocks banged against my door. As i looked up from my knees at the door burst open, revealing Simon searching the room.
Once our eyes met he glared at me with hatred “You spoiled little bitch, you kill my wife and then treat your father this way!” he said as he stormed over to me. He viciously grabbed my arms pulling me up. I turned my head, but only for it to be met by his hand as it collided with my right cheek.
He threw me on my bed so easily, trapping me by holding both my hands in his right hand above my head whilst he pulled down my pants with his other hand. With limited movements i could only wriggle my body to protest but it was no use as i laid under him, naked from the waist down, tears blurred my vision but i could tell that he was now positioning himself between my legs.
With one hungry thrust he had broken my virtue. I had let out a scream, kicked my feet and tried pushing my hands away but nothing would work, he just kept pounding his cock into me. It was all so painful, but i couldn’t do anything about it.
“Ughh, you’re so tight” he grunted through his teeth then plunged in and out one last time before withdrawing is cock and squirting his hot, sticky white stuff all over my bruised stomach. He collapsed on top of me for a short while to get his breath back before staggering off my bed and down the hall to his own room. I laid there, curled up in blood, semen and tears wishing that it would never happen again. That night Simon Wilson had raped me but it was by no means the last time.
I am brought back to reality when i heard a car horn to the right of me. I stop in my tracks as the window rolled down revealing Jacks smug face.
“I thought you wanted the toilet?” He questioned
“Oh, i meant the one at home..” i gave a sarcastic smile, but he replied with a full, all teeth genuine smile building the lust inside me.
“Even though that was a fake smile, its the only smile i’ve seen on your face. You should smile more often, you look hot” I blushed and it coloured my face red. He had just complimented me! I didn’t know how to respond other than to put up a barrier of cockiness.
“I smile all the time, just not when i’m with you! Its funny how that works, isn’t it” I resumed my fast pace walking, now only 10 minutes left to make what should be 20 minutes left till my house.
“owch, that hurt! I’ll forgive you if you let me drive you home. Its the least i could do, it is my fault you’re going to be late.” He stopped the car, just as i had stopped walking.
I closed my eyes for a second, taking in a deep breath through my nose and out through my mouth. I knew he could get me home on time so i opened my eyes. “fine, but this doesn’t mean i’m going to tutor you!” I shook my finger at him, to which he laughed his deep warm hearted laugh as he unlocked the passenger door. I blushed once more before climbing into his black Mazda CX-5.
He put his hands up in a defensive way, “no no no, just giving my friend a lift home” He smiled his too over confident smile.
“We’re not friends” I said dryly
“I don’t want any friends” I took a big breath in and closed my eyes “i just want to be left alone” I opened my eyes and stared out the window. Since my father started to abuse me, i separated from my friends and never made any new ones. I couldn’t let anyone in close enough to see my scars or to find out what Simon was doing to me or i could be in for a worse fate.
“well that’s tough because we’re now friends!” I shot my head to face his. He lifted his hand and i tensed my body, gasped and shut my eyes ready for the pain. After a while i opened my eyes and let out the breath i was holding. I realised that he wasn't goint to hit me, he only wanted to shake my hand. “Hi, i’m Jack Edwards”.
I looked up at his flawless, model like face to see it pained with confusion and pain from my reaction to his hand, unable to face the pain in his eyes I could only look at his hand, fear still pumping through my veins.
When he knew i wasn’t going to shake his hand he brushed it through his rough hair and back on the steering wheel and pulled back out onto the road.
“East or west?” He asked the ultimate question, this is what divided the school from the popular to the geeks. The west was home to some of the grandest houses, enough to sleep a large family and all the staff, something i have only ever had chance of seeing once, when i was younger. Then there was where i lived, the south east. The east was home to some of the poorest, but the south east was worse! If there was a shooting, drug deal or murder, it was happening in the south east. No place like home eh!
“erm..” i cleared my throat “east... south east” He looked at me shocked, swallowed deep then smiled his prince charming smile.
“This is me” I whispered, as we pulled up across the road from my small, run down house. Looking over at the clock on the dash board it read 4:55pm. I had made it in time, maybe tonight i won’t get beaten as hard. I leaned over to open the door. My heart sank, “Unlock the door!” he smiled his arrogant smile at me, but i didn’t have time for this. “UNLOCK THE DOOR!”
“no, first agree to tutor me”
“I DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS!” i had now tried the door handle several times, frantically trying to get out the metal cage he had locked us both in. I was starting to hyperventilate as images of what could happen flash in my mind.
“why?” He asked puzzled to know why i have to be home precisely.
We sat silent for a while. My gaze now focused on the car driving down the road and pulling into my drive way. I was too late, Simon was home. My eyes followed him as he got out the car and into the house. It would be about now he was realising i wasn’t there. A tear shot down my cheek as i thought about what he was going to do to me.
My phone started to ring nonstop, one call after the other all reading Simon as the caller ID. Now my tears fell faster, more uncontrollable.
“What’s wrong? Don’t cry! I was only playing with you” He lent it to touch me on my shoulder, but i only tensed and clutched the car seat tightly making my knuckles white.
“Please... please let me out” I whimpered and before he could touch me he unlocked the doors. I pulled the handle and then pushed the door open. I basically ran to the front door, but before i could unlock it, the door had swung open and i had fallen inside.
“I’m sorry.. i’m so sorry i’m late!” i frantically tried to apologise but it was no use, he was dragging me up the stairs to my room by my hair. He threw me on my bead and trapped me under his grasp on my throat.
“WHO WAS THAT IN THE CAR?” i couldn’t answer, there was no air getting to my lungs. “ANSWER ME WHORE!”
“LIAR! I TOLD YOU I AM THE ONLY MAN YOU CAN EVER LOVE! I HAVE PROVEN THIS TO YOU BEFORE!”
“no” i tried to breath in “i tutor him in English.. ask.. my teacher” My face started to turn red and my eyes were going blurry, i knew if he didn’t take his hand off my i could pass out.
He pealed his hand away from my throat and grabbed my wrist. I tried to let in as much oxygen in as i could but every breath burned as it went to my lungs, but i couldn’t get enough.
“i’ll call your teacher in the morning and you better not be lying to me!” his grip grew tighter on my wrists and i knew that they were going to bruise. He lent down, forcing his lips on me and only breaking the touch to punch me in the stomach.
The next morning i was forced awake by a bucket of cold water being splashed on my face. I instantly sat up, wincing as the pain from my stomach resurfaced.
“i called your teacher, he said that you have to tutor this boy but only once a week! So every Saturday you go to his house but you have to be back here by 5:00pm otherwise you’re not allowed to leave the house again! Do you hear me?” He spoke through his teeth, with hatred in his eyes.
“Y..yes sir” I whispered.
“Get ready he’ll be here in at 8:30am” he threw the bucket to the floor and sat on my bed. He lifted his hand to my throat “and if you think about telling anyone about our little secret..” his grasp got tighter.
He left my room and headed for the stairs. It wasn’t until i heard him bang the front door shut and get into his car to drive to work until i let out the breath i didn’t know i was holding in.
My eyes darted to the clock; it read 6:00am Saturday morning. I stripped the dirty sheets from my bed and went to rid myself of last night’s rape. When i got out the shower i stood in front of my long mirror and pulled the towel off, revealing my naked body so i could examine the damage that was done. My stomach had suffered the most, it was black, red and blue and too sore to touch. My eyes drifted to my more than averaged size breast and to my nipples, his bite marks still prominent and pink. My thighs had purple coloured out lines of his hands from him prying my legs open to get better access to my vagina.
Then what i had dreaded the most, places that could be seen, my face and wrist. My cheeks crimson from the powerful slaps he sliced across my face several times, eyes puffy from the crying and lips battered from the pounding of his lips.
Finally my eyes flicked down to my wrists, and i was right, his heavy grasping of my wrists had left purple marks on each wrist. But still this wasn’t the worst he had ever done.
I carefully picked my clothes, a long sleeved top, skinny black jeans and jacket to make sure none of my marks could be revealed. I was sometimes grateful that Simon doesn’t take care of me properly, like make me sit down for dinner or give me lunch money because now i can fit into a size 6 comfortably even though some school days i sometimes pass out due to having no energy left in me.
I heard a car pull up outside, i ran to the window thinking Simon came back because he hadn’t had enough of me yet. My body instantly calmed and i let out the breath i was holding unconsciously as i saw Jack step out of his car and towards my front door. I ran down stairs and opened the door to find him practically filling it with his big muscular body.
“Hi” he smiled at me and my face turned red. Why do i keep acting like this around him? I look to floor to hide my shame.
“Hello” i replied, dryly. “ let me just get my things” I turned back to go get my school bag when I noticed Jack following me into the house. I quickly turn, using my body to block entrance into the house.
“what’s wrong?” Jack frowned slightly but still looking so sexy “you don’t want me to come in?” His eyes pierce at me and I feel as though he can see through me. Feeling uncomfortable I look down at my shoes, hiding my tomato coloured face.
“no” I whispered.
Jack now with a confused look nods his head, turns on his heal and heads towards his car. I shut the door behind me and quickly gather everything I’ll need. I frantically search my room for my phone and I start to freak, if I don’t take it and Simon can’t get in contact with me, I don’t think I’ll be able to leave the house for a week but not from him stopping me but from the marks he would leave.
After 20 minutes of searching, I finally find it under a pile of clothes, sighed with relief and rushed down stairs.
I locked the door and walked up to the passenger side of Jacks car. I paused before opening the door, thinking whether this was a good idea.
I finally opened the door slowly and sat but before I could change my mind Jack turned to face me.
“You ready? What took you so long?” with genuine concern on his face he looked so hot but it was strange for me to get sympathy from someone after the constant abuse I regularly get.
“Why do you care?” I snapped, trying to cover up the shake in my voice. Damn Jack, why does he have to be so sexy and considerate?
“I do care, when you worry you get this cute, but sad wrinkle in your forehead” he gave a shy smile then started the car and pulled out of the driveway. Wow Jack actually notices me! Wait, why does this keep effecting me? Yes sure he’s got a Greek God like body, popular, sexy smile and now caring but I can’t let him affect me like this otherwise both me and him will be put into danger by the hands of my father.
When my cheeks flashed bright red from thinking about his body I shook my head to snap out of it and concentrate on how I was going to get myself through today.
All through the drive i kept repeating in my head that Jack wasn’t going to harm me, but being locked inside a big metal box with him my thoughts just went back to last night. I tightly clenched my hand into a fist and my nails dug so hard it broke skin sending a burning pain through me to distract me from my memories.
“You had breakfast yet?” I jumped from the sudden question as it took me out of my thoughts. “Emma?”
“oh… erm… no”
“it’s the most important meal of the day! Do you want anything in particular?” With adrenalin and fear running through me, all I could manage in response was a shake of my head saying
The 10 minute drive to the café seemed like forever and I felt the blood in my palm from the increase of pressure my nails put on the wound they created. Once we pulled up and I was out in the open, in public, I released the pressure and relaxed and followed Jack into the café.
We had just missed the morning rush so there was only us, the teenaged waitress and an elder gentleman in the corner cradling a coffee whilst he glanced at life passing by the window. I slid into my seat in a both off to the side before the waitress came up to our table. He handed us both menus, but although she asked me what I wanted, she only looked at Jack with lust in her eyes. I wanted to stand up, slam her face into the counter and.. wait, what was I thinking!?!
When I looked up Jack had ordered almost everything on the menu.
“I didn’t know what you liked..” Before he could finish, I interrupted
“So you order everything!?! Wow rich people really don’t know the true meaning of spending money wisely!”
“That’s a mean stereotype, anyway my family have always had money… I’m sure a little breakfast wouldn’t even put a dent in it” he chuckled as he proudly shown off his wealth.
I could be bothered to argue back, so instead I rolled my eyes.
“Anyway, how you know so much about me but whenever I ask you a question you always answer it with a question.” Jack tilted his head to the side but kept a playful smile on his face.
“why do you always have to ask questions?” I snapped, I don’t like people digging too much into my personal life.
“you’re right” The look of hurt crossed his face, “I’m sorry” His eyes never left mine and once more my face turned into a tomato and I bit my bottom lip to try and contain some of the lust I had for him… it was difficult.
Before I could answer the pervert waitress returned with our never ending order of food. The plates filled the table and my eyes darted to each one, I haven’t eaten since Thursday!
Jack shuffled the plate of bacon and eggs in my direction with a smug smile on his face, I think he might have saw my gawking at them. My eyes never left the plate as I made a pro cons list in my mind, but soon hunger took over my logic and my body gave in and reached for the fork and knife, but as I reached I made sure the bruises on my wrists never shown.
I dug in to the delicious, crispy bacon and the poached egg done to perfection and let out a silent groan to show my appreciation of the food, only to be met by Jacks groan and shuffle in his seat. When I looked up I saw that Jack had stopped eating and staring deep into my eyes. I saw lust and hunger in his, something I had seen many times with Simon, however this time, it was different with Jack. I should have been repulsed by this, but instead I started to get wet between my legs and I know Jack was different. How could my groan make him look at me this way?
For the rest of the meal I made sure I didn’t make another sound because I felt as though Jack had made that face at me again, we would have done it there on the table. I was both scared and excited by the idea, but fear took over.
Getting out of Jacks car, I had only just notice how extravagant the houses.. no the mansions in the north west were! I was too busy trying to keep calm in the car to look out the window but now, the full view of his house was mind blowing. The castle- like mansion was white, three floors high and surrounded by vast amounts of grass covered land.
“Emma?” Jack’s deep sexy voice snapped me out of my trance of admiration over something he so casually calls home. I blink and start to follow Jack up the beautiful stone pathway, boarded by nicely trimmed flowers of all kind.
When we entered his room, almost three times as big as mine with a walk in wardrobe and bathroom, opposite to the king-sized bed. His room was painted blue and balck, but still kept light from his huge windows taking up the whole wall on the far side.
Jack walked over to his bed and sat down, rubbing the space next to him suggesting that i sat there. Instead i went to his desk and set up the books needed to teach this monkey some English but i was stopped by his sexy chuckle at my stubbornness. It went quiet for a moment until Jack was standing behind me and i stiffened.
He lent down, his lips brushing against my ear "Just relax, i'm not going to bite" He whispered with a smile spreading across his face as he reached over me to grab the poetry book, sending shivers all over my body. I turned my head away trying to control the heat rushing to my cheeks, but i only stiffened more. He gripped my shoulder and i jumped from the chair, anger and fear both rushing through me as i turned and faced him.
"Emma?.. " His face had gone from handsomely joyful to hurt, but still making him look sexy which only angered me more.
"Just because i was forced to tutor you doesn't mean we're friends and definitely doesn't mean you can just willingly touch me whenever you want.." He lifted his hands into a defensive position and took a step forward but i only responded by lifting my hand signalling him to stop and took a step back to widen the space between us. He looked even more upset, and i began to regret what i was saying, but i had to because i couldn’t have anyone get close to me, not again. I closed my eyes to suppress the tears.
"I will only tutor you if stay..." I was cut off by Jack grasping my bruised wrist tightly causing me to wince. I opened my eyes and was shocked as i stared into his eyes, which were now filled with anger.
"WHAT IS THIS?" He shouted, mostly concern wrapped around his words whilst pointing to the old scars, covered by the fresh ones on my hand. I cowered in fear as now i couldn't see Jack, but Simon in front of me and my instincts just took over.
I started to cry and beg for my release as my body shrunk to protect my body from any attack.
I could feel her tensing beneath me and it saddened me that she still didn't trust me so i reached out and put my hand on her shoulder to try and comfort her but she jumped away from me and seemed even more scared. I mentally kicked myself for the fear i saw in her eyes, i never wanted to see that again.
"Just because i was forced to tutor you doesn't mean we're friends and definitely doesn't mean you can just willingly touch me whenever you want.." Her words were like a knife to my heart, she was right she was forced to be here with me but i don't care, i had never felt this way about anyone before. I put my hands up in a defensive way as my eyes mirrored the pain i was feeling from her words, and i stepped forward, i just wanted to cage her in my arms and keep her in my protection forever. To show her that everything was alright.
Her hand flew up as she stepped back, stopping me in my tracks and closed her eyes. Tears started to blur my vision but stopped when i zoomed in on her hands. They were covered in scars, both old ones and fresh ones and i lost control of my body, i wanted to know who had caused these, to who had damaged what is mine.
I ran to her and grabbed her hand and pulled it closer to me so i could examine it closer. "WHAT IS THIS?" I didn't mean to shout but i want to know so i could kill whoever the bastard was!
Her eyes were tearing up as she looked at me with pure fear and her eyes darkened. I snapped out of my anger as she started to shrink towards the floor and cried for me to let her go.
I released her arm, but before she could hit the floor i wrapped my arms around her waist and sat her on my lap. She started to hit and push me away, but she belonged in my arms.
"I’m sorry, i'm so so sorry, i didn't mean to hurt you, i'm sorry" I tried to apologise because it killed me to see her like this. She stopped hitting me as i cradled her closer, her head fell and rested on my shoulder and her unsteady warm breathing hit my neck.
After sitting like this for a while, she started to calm down and her crying turned into a whimper. If i thought she couldn't be more attractive and it made me think back to her warning me about never touching her again but i will always touch her, because she’s mine!
Just holding her petite body close to mine had my body acting on its own and i could feel my cock getting semi-hard. I heard her let out a small giggle, so cute and sexy, i had now become completely hard.
She lifted her head up and stared at me with her puffy red eyes. "Maybe you should sort that out" I followed her eyes down to the bulge in my pants. I blushed and got up, with her still in my arms. I didn't want to let go, but i could see i was making her uncomfortable.
"Erm.. i'm just going to get a shower.. just start on the work i'll be a sec."
I ran into the bathroom and turned the shower on cold and let it run over my body, but i couldn't stop thinking about her, about her in my arms, and i went hard again.
Jack had been in the shower for a while and every time i thought about being close to him i blushed. When we were cuddling i could resist noticing that he smelt like lavender and the warmth from his body wrapped around my body, comforted me. While he held me, just for a moment, i had forgotten everything bad in my life. Jack has been the second person i thought i could let my guard down to, but i can't because if he gets too close he will find out about what Simon does to me and i know he will be disgusted and never want to see me again.
Just the thought of not being close to Jack made my eyes start to water, and what’s more is that if Simon thinks i'm getting too close to Jack, he will harm us both. But i held the tears back and repeated in my head 'it's fine Emma, just stay away and no-one will be harmed! not again..
I was ripped from my thoughts as Jack walked back into the room.. topless!! A drop of water fell from his sexy wet brown hair and down his perfectly chiseled abs and through his snail trail then absorbed into the towel tied low on his waste.
I swallowed the lust away and bit my lip as my eyes started to travel back up, until my eyes met his. He was looking at me and i blushed.
"like what you see?" He raised his eye brow
"pushhhh, w..what? no..." i turned my head away from the awkwardness and heat filled my cheeks.
Jack chuckled as he rustled through his walk in wardrobe before re-appearing fully dressed and i sighed with disappointment. Wow, what’s happening? i can't think this way!
For the rest of the day we sat at his desk and worked on poetry, and i was grateful that we acting as if my little break down didn't happen.
I leaned over to turn the page when Jack reached and placed his soft yet strong hand in mine. Shocked i quickly turned, my eyes met his as he leaned in closer, my nose was now filled with the lavender smell radiating off of him.
"please tell me how you got these scars on your hand" he whispered and his lips brushed my ear. His question surprised me, and i quickly searched my brain for a believable excuse..
"erm.. when i get nervous... i press my nails into my palm.. i guess i don't realise how hard i press sometimes.." its was true, just not completely true. I couldn't look at him as my eyes started to fill with tears.
"Why do you get so nervous? some of these are fresh.." he traced his finger over the line of freshly broken skin "..did you do this when you were with me" His voice broke and i could feel that he was hurt and didn't want to know the true answer. I couldn't find my voice so i just nodded for 'yes'.
He gripped my hand tighter "i'm sorry, please don't.." he whispered and a tear fell on my arm. I looked up to see tears fall from Jacks eyes, something i never thought i would see someone like Jack do.
A sudden flush of feelings filled me and i never wanted Jack to cry over me but i wanted him to wrap his arms around me again so i can feel protected and safe in his arms.
"don't be... its not your fault.. i just get nervous”
Jack put his hand under my chin, lifting my face up so that we were looking into each other’s eyes and leaving only a small space between us. Before i could turn away Jack closed the inch between us, softly brushing his lips against mine. At first he was gentle with me as if i was fragile and easily breakable, but soon he deepened the warm kiss and it got rougher.
We separated momentarily, both of us gasping for air, “S..stop...” was all i was able to say before our lips connected again. Jack had one hand snaked around my waist whilst the other was in my hair pushing me closer to his muscular, warm body.
He traced his tongue across my bottom lip, asking for permission to enter my mouth but i kept my lips shut. I wanted him, i needed him! But i couldn’t, i didn’t want Jack to get hurt just because he wants another fuck buddy and i didn’t want to be hurt just because i was added to Jack’s list of the many sluts he has slept with. So with all the strength i had i started to hit my fist into his hard chest trying to push him away but he only moved his hands from my waist to my wrists to stop me from hitting him.
I winced again at the pain shooting from my bruised wrist and hot tears began to run down my cheeks and onto Jacks. He pulled away and i took that chance to grab my things and run out the room and down the stairs.
I was just about to reach the front door before i felt a familiar grasp on my elbow pulling be back and into a warm embrace. “I’m sorry, i keep hurting you..”
I pulled away, my anger helped me ignore his upset expression. “stop.. just stop apologising! I know you don’t really mean it!” It started as a whisper but I finished it shouting at him.
“I do mean it, i care about you Emma!” His 6ft4 figure drowned my 5ft5 body, but i still kept my ground.
“ha! Is that what you tell all the girls so you can get them into bed with you!”
Jack looked down at his feet and whispered “I admit i’ve slept around, but you’re different!” He now looked up at me, square in the eyes with fire burning in his and full of confidence “I’ve never felt this way about someone before! Just from the way you concentrate in class makes my heart beat faster and for god’s sake i got a hard on just from being close to you!” What he said blew me back. I wanted to believe him, but he’s just like every other guy.
I looked away “can you just take me home..”
The ride home was quiet and awkward, although i appreciated the silence and concentrated more on keeping my nerves under control, using the only method i knew how to.. i guess i’m going to have more scars on my hand.
We pulled up outside my house at 3:34pm. I sighed with relief when i saw that Simon wasn’t back either.
I went to open the door when Jack gently placed his hand on mine. I looked from his hand to his face and then back down until he took the hint and pulled away. “Goodnight” He gave a shy smile, but still he looks hot!
I got out and ran over to the door, locking it behind me.
I ran into my room, but saved taking a shower until after the job my ‘father’ was going to do to me. I just hope he is drunk enough to soften the blows, even if its just a little.
Sunday passed quickly, and was took up by me cleaning the house from top to bottom whilst Simon was at the pub... the usual Sunday routine Simon though would be fun for me to do!
When Monday came, i wasn’t as happy as i usually was. I mean although i was bullied at school, it still got me away from Simon who did far worse than anyone could at school but today was different because i would have to face Jack just after we kissed last night.
My first three lessons went quite quickly because i had English, a free period which i spent alone in the library and then maths. Being a straight A student, i loved being taught new things because when i was working out a math equation, my concentration was off Simon. But what made it all better was that i hadn’t seen Jack in any of my lessons!... but had i spoken too soon!!
I slowly packed my bags as usual so that i was last out. When i made my way to the hall way i slammed into a wall, forcing me to stumble back. I looked up to find Jack blocking the doorway.
“let me out!”
“no, not until you agree to have lunch with me”
“no, i’m not hungry...” and if by magic, by stomach decides that in that moment it would rumble! I quickly look down at my feet in embarrassment.
“the stomach never lies” He laughed and i could tell he had a prince charming smile painted across his face. “come on, i’m not going to bite! And we need to talk about what happened on Saturday...”
The room went silent for a moment until my stomach embarrassed me once more with a growl. I looked up and admitted defeat by pushing past him and storming out into the hall, down to lunch.
I was about to go sit down when Jack dragged me to the lunch queue and passed me a tray then started to pile food onto it.
“i don’t have any money on me..” I never did, Simon never gave me lunch money or rarely fed me at home so i would stay thin and ‘beautiful’ as he would say. I started to put the food back when Jack grabbed the plate and put it back on the tray.
“my treat then” My eyes started to melt at the sight of joy in his eyes. And a flash back of my mother popped into my head and how the same warm happy face would brighten my day.
We sat in the far corner, far from Jacks ‘crew’ that consisted of the jocks and cheerleaders. I got a few evil looks from every girl in the room and heard some of the gossip that was already starting to spread. I began to feel self conscious as all eyes were now on us and i didn’t like it.
When i looked back at Jack, all the attention we were getting never seemed to bother him as he was just sitting there playing with the grey slime on his plate.
“I can’t believe the school count this as edible, let alone nutritious!”
I looked down at my tray, got a spoon full and put it to my lips. Although it looked, smelt and i knew it was going to taste bad.. it was free and i knew it was going to be the only food i was eating for a long time.
I started to shovel down the food, moaning at how it was making me feel full! “mmmm!”
I was about to devour another spoon full when a deep, warm hearted laugh stopped me. I looked up to see Jack with his head thrown back and laughing at me.
“i can’t believe you actually like that!” I lifted my shoulders to say it wasn’t all that bad and continued to eat. I let out moan this time as the warmth of the grey slime passed my throat to my stomach.
This time i was stopped by a sharp gasp from Jack. His eyes were now filled with what looked like lust.. had this come from the moan i gave off? I stopped eating, placing my spoon down.
“oh no, please don’t stop eating! I enjoy watching you eat, its as though you haven’t been fed for weeks!” Jack began to laugh, but i sat frozen as what he said was true, it had been a while since i had a warm diner.
Struck by my silence, Jack stopped laughing and just stared at me. I saw his fist curl by his sides as anger seemed to take over his body. “You haven’t been eating?” He said through his teeth.
I quickly needed to search my brain for some answers, for help to get out of this!!!! “oh.. erm.. i’m... i’m on this new diet...” As i told my lie, i couldn’t look Jack in the eyes. I wanted to tell him but i couldn’t! He wasn’t to be trusted!!
I looked up and saw that he wasn’t believing a word i said, so as his anger was replaced by hurt, and his eyebrows pushed together with concern he said “Well maybe you should stop this ‘diet’, you’re so thin! Please Emma, please eat!” He was begging, making me think he cared about me! but i knew he didn’t.
I just wanted lunch to end quickly, i wanted this day to end. I got out my phone to check the time, only ten minutes left.
“So about last Saturday..” Jack broke the silence but before he could finish i stood up, pushing my chair back.
“Its almost time for lesson, see you tomorrow” I grabbed my bag and ran towards the door.
“EMMA!” jack shouted behind me, but i didn’t turn around! I couldn’t face him again!
It wasn’t until i got home until i realised i had lost my phone. I searched all around my room, in my bag and the rest of the house but it was nowhere to be found. Then i remembered that i had taken it out to check the time when i was having lunch with Jack. OH GREAT!!
I made a plan to go to school early tomorrow and see if it had been handed in, or even talk to Jack if i had to because that was the only way Simon could get a hold of me when i wasn’t at home. If Simon found out i had lost it, let’s just say i won’t be able to walk for a week! I began to relax, and walked down to make Simon his diner when there was a knock on the front door.. who would it be at this time?
“EMMA” i shouted as she ran away from me. She had left her phone on the table, but i don’t think she noticed. Should i give it into the office? Or should i give it back to her when i next see her? I think i’ll go with option two.. at least that way she would have to talk to me to get it back! Haha! I smiled to myself as i walked to my next lesson, please with my plan.
Football practice ended at 5, like usual, but i wasn’t in my zone.. i was too busy thinking about Emma and i needed to see her! I needed her warmth, her sexy smell of vanilla invading my nostrils and i needed her in my arms. I started my car and pulled out of school, making my way home.
My thoughts then drifted off to our passionate kiss we shared. I knew she wanted me as much as i wanted her, i could feel it in the kiss we shared! Her soft lips pressing onto mine... no! Not again! Thinking about her had turned me on again and before i could realise i was driving down her road. Maybe i could use giving her phone back to her as an excuse to see her. But i needed to calm 'little Jack' down before being in front of her family so i decided to take this time to type my number into her phone and save hers on mine.
I walked up her driveway with a car parked in it, maybe it was her dads? I walked up to the front door and took a few deep breaths before knocking.
The air had gone silent before the door swung open, revealing a large man filling the frame. Although he was tall, i was still taller than him by 2 inches and i could see this bothered him as he straightened his back to gain an inch, cleared his throat and then crossed his arms.
“Who are you? What do you want?” He seemed to be angry at me for some reason.
“I’m Jack Edwards, i go to school with your Emma. She left her phone on the table today at lunch and i came to return it to her... is she here?”
The older man looked me up and down, anger burning in his eyes and causing a stress vein on his neck to pop further. To a regular person, he would have scared the hell out of them, but i’m use to these types of people so i took his anger as a challenge.
“I don’t think so” He snarled before snatching the phone from my grasp. “Don’t worry, i’ll make sure to tell Emma that you dropped by”
He began to shut the door in my face, but before it slammed shut i thought i could see Emma on the stairs, frozen and with a look of horror on her face. Was it from seeing me? From her father? No it can’t be, her father seems just a little over protective of her, at least i know he cares about her but i would have to talk to him about her being mine now as i was even more protective over my Emma.
I got in my car and pulled away from the curb. But the whole ride home i couldn’t shake this feeling of uncertainty about leaving Emma and i couldn’t rid the look of horror on her face.
Simon grabbed my phone out of Jack’s hand and slammed the door shut, but i was paying no attention as i thought of the horror that was now about to happen.
The door slammed shut, clicking locked then silence covered the room as none of us had made a move yet. I saw Simon start to shake with rage, as i shook with fear. Simon slowly turned around, complete anger boiling from his body as he looked at me with pure hate in his eyes.
“Your b...boy... BOYFRIEND RETURNED YOUR PHONE!!!” he shouted through his teeth.
“no...” i whispered but before i knew it i was being dragged by my hair to my bedroom and thrown onto my bed, but he didn’t follow me onto it... instead he went down the hall and into his room.
What? Maybe tonight, seeing me with someone else, he knows he can’t keep doing this to me! A smile broke across my face as i thought and hoped... but again i had spoken too soon. After rummaging around in his room, Simon had returned to mine but this time with rope!
“NOOOO! DADDY I’M S..SOOORY!! HE’S NOBODY!” Kneeling on my bed i was trying to scream reasoning at Simon, even calling him daddy for the first time so that he knew this was wrong! He just ignored me and charged at me.
Before tying me up he ripped all item of clothing from my body he then wrapped my right arm to the far right post and then did the same to my left on the other post. He followed by also tying my feet to the bottom board, apart so that he could have access to my womanhood before he just knelt in the space between my legs... disgustingly admiring my body. 7
I wiggled my body, trying to fee one of my limbs to try and keep some of my modesty and cover my body but it only seemed to encourage him more. He loomed over me, resting on one arm and using the other to stroke up the side of my body, he started from my thigh then up, past my hips, over my flat stomach to my breast. He cupped my size D breast, but it only sent a shiver down my spine from how wrong this was.
“S..ss..sstop.. Owwww!” He bit down hard on my nipple after hearing my plea for freedom.
He looked up at me, with eyes i have only seen him with once more. “Don’t you learn.. you stupid girl!” He sat up and slapped me across the face. “Didn’t you learn from the last time you brought a boy home?!?”
As Simon continued to slap my face and punch my stomach repeatedly, i kept trying to think of an excuse to tell Simon that would save both me and Jack. So that jack wouldn’t turn out like the last boy i introduced as my boyfriend! No stop! I can’t think back to him... it hurts me more than anything Simon could do to me.
“J.. jack is the o..o..one i tutor.. nothing more...” My whimpers made me stutter my words.
Simon stopped his attacks as he sat up and straddled me, roughly grabbing my cheeks so my attention was all on his face, looking at his angered eyes with my tear filled eyes.
“YOU. ARE. NOT. TUTORING HIM ANYMORE!! And you are not to see him at all, because if i find out that you have just asked him for a pencil in lesson than i will do more to him than i did to the last boy who tried to take you away from me!!”
I was shocked by his demand, but i realised that he is being even more serious than last time... last time he didn’t go as far as to tie me up!
Unable to speak, i just nodded my head for ‘yes’. This was going to be hard.. try and not be with Jack.. one of the most persistent and possessive guys i have ever met.. well this was going to be a challenge but it has to be done otherwise i fear for Jacks life.
Simon slapped me one more time before he got between my legs “now tonight is for me, for me to get over what you’ve done! But tomorrow... ughhh!” he stopped to push his shaft into me, and the tears collecting in my eyes poured out. “...tomorrow, you will receive your punishment!” Wait, this wasn’t the punishment!
As Simon slid his penis in and out of me, there was no please, just pain! Pain came from between my legs and from the punches to my stomach and face. I could start to taste blood in my mouth, and it only took one more blow before i was knocked out.
I woke up from my unconsciousness by the familiar cold water being splashed in my face. I went to sit up and to wipe the water away from my face but my body was pulled back as my arms didn’t move. I quickly flicked my head back and stared at my arms then down to my legs... they were still attached to the bed! I was still trapped!
I looked up to find Simon, now with crossed arms and a smug smile on his face standing by my bed. He leaned forward and pulled on the rope, making it rub more on my already sore, chapped and bleeding wrist due to the friction of rubbing from the rope. I gave a quiet whimper from the pain.
“now now, little one.. shhhhhh! There, there..” he gently rubbed a tear from my cheek and tucked a stray hair behind my ear. I flinched under the sudden contact, instinctively because of his usual abuse.
He grabbed the rope again, this time pulling it harder. Blood started to drip from my wrist and onto the bed!
“Ahhhhhh!” i screamed in pain.
“don’t cry baby..” he leaned in closer, brushing my ear with his lips “... because this is me going easy on you compared to what i have planned for you tonight!!”
I swallowed, trying to clear my dry throat and push the fear down, my heart sank and i began to shake in fear! But soon the feel of disgust covered my fear as Simon began to slowly slide his hand from my face to by breast. He squeezed my nipple, flicking it a few times before continuing to travel down to my vagina where he slid a finger in and played with my pussy with his thumb.
“now you stay laying her, all sexy for me for when i return!” he removed his hand from within me and slapped me on the face. “oh and i’ve stretched this rope out more so you can reach the glass of water on here” he said as he pointed from my right hand to the table next to my bed before he started to walk out of my room.
“w...where a..a..are you g..going?” It was barely audible but it still stopped him in his tracks. He swiftly turned on his heal, heading straight for me. He bent down and slapped me so hard on my face that it forced my head to fly the other way.
“DO NOT TALK UNLESS SPOKEN TO WHORE!” I turned my head back to his, but i didn’t dare give eye contact. “and i need to go to work.. have fun!” He began to exit my room again, only this time he chuckled, deep and darkly, sending shivers up my spine.
I waited till he was out of the house and pulling his car out of the drive before giving into every emotion i was feeling and let it out through crying and crying.
I had lost track of time from crying until i had no tears left in me. When i looked at my alarm clock it read 2:34pm and it made me think of how i should be in English, wrapped up in the wonders of poetry, but instead i was a prisoner in my own home!
My thought then went to Jack.. this was all his fault!! If only he had just left me alone! Tears started to sting my eyes again but i found myself too tired to cry, instead my heavy eye lids couldn’t resist any longer and a fell into a deep sleep and hoping that when i a wake that this was just another nightmare!!
I was coming out of my deep sleep when i felt something heavy sitting on my waist then hot air being breathed into my ear, making me flinch into complete awareness that it was Simon.
I fluttered my eyes open to be met with Simons deep brown eyes looking into mine.
Surprised i tried to shuffle from under him but he stopped me by grabbing my neck. “i’m going to untie you now and if you even think of trying anything..” He didn’t need to say anything else as he brought the knife he was holding into view, and i knew what he meant.
After untying my legs then my wrist but still keeping the ropes attached to my wrist, he dragged me by them off and around my bed and forcing me to kneel by the foot of my bed. He re-attached the rope, to make sure i had no escape before he rustled around behind me but being unable to turn my head all i heard was metal clanging together.
That sound rung in my ears as it forced back horrifying memories of the first and only time, so far, Simon had used that torture device on me, the first time he had used it has been the source of the many scars on my back. The first time he had used it was when my first and last boyfriend, Liam was introduced to Simon.
The only way i can describe this torture devices is to compare it to a whip, however at the end of each strand there is a blade that when hit at full speed against skin will slice deep into the body. After the first time Simon used this device on me, i counted the 32 scars on my back from the only 3 whips he had given me!
I was pulled from my traumatic past when Simon gently placed his hand on my back.
“You know you deserve this! Maybe this time you will learn!” He traced his fingers over the scars on my back, “Every time i see these, it makes me happy because it shows i can control you.. because you are MINE and that if you EVER disobey me, then you will be punished by my hands.. and my hands ALONE!!”
He backed away, and i tried to prepare my body for the impact. When the first shot sliced at my back, i the felt white hot pain then followed by the tickle of blood pouring down my body. By the fourth i had blacked out due to the extreme pain! I was so grateful that i wasn't strong enough to not have to sit through till the end!
10 days of what seemed like never ending rape and beatings, Simon had decided i was to start going back to school as the lie he was telling the teachers about there being a family emergency had them asking more and more questions as the days went on.
It was Thursday morning. Last night had been the first night my restraints were removed and i had slept alone. It felt weird not having my movements restricted, but by no means did i miss it!
I shakily made my way to the bathroom, locking the door behind me. I hadn’t seen myself for the whole 10 day, i haven’t seen the damage done or the damage that still remains.. i guess i am scared that something has scared in a place people will see and would want to question me about.
I hesitantly started to lift my head up until i bestowed my eyes upon the work Simon had done, and hats off to him! He had done some horrifying work!
I started with the damage to my face. My eyes swollen from the river of tears i have cried, my cheeks crimson red and my bottom lip cut and a little bruised from the punches and slaps. Then i started to look down, past my bruised neck with the hand imprints of Simons heavy grasps he clamped over it and down to where the most damaged had been inflicted... my back.
Simon had rubbed cream all over the cuts on my back and covered it in bandages, not for my benefit, just so that it didn’t get infected and so we wouldn’t have to go to hospital, or so that i didn't died... otherwise he would have a lot of explaining to do..
I gently unwrapped the cloth until i was stood naked in front of the mirror. I grabbed the smaller mirror off the side and turned my back to the bigger one. Looking from the smaller one i could see the full view of my back and i was mortified! It was as though i had no skin on my back! And the little skin that was untouched had been covered in dried blood!
I gasped in shock and almost dropped the mirror, i didn’t want to believe that Simon... my father could do this... would do this to his own daughter! I ran back into my room and over to my wardrobe to get a t-shirt, i needed a shower but i knew it would be painful to have water touch my still fresh cuts. When reached to get the top, it was only then that i noticed my wrist! They had been tied up for 9 days and were almost as bad as my back as they had been chapped from the relentless friction burning with any slight movement i had made.
I shook my head clear.. i needed to concentrate on getting ready but first.. i grabbed my camera that i kept tucked away and hidden because i have taken a picture of every major scar Simon had marked on my body.. just in case i grew enough courage to take him to court!
As i carefully slipped the top over my head and over my body, i looked out of the window to find Simons car wasn’t in the driveway! I sighed with relief and felt myself relax.
After a well deserved shower my back throbbed with pain, highlighting every little move i made! But now i had to focus on dressing to hide everything. I went to my underwear draw but thought it was best i didn’t put on a bra.. just the thought sent shivers down my spine! I laid out some black panties, dark blue skinny jeans and a loose black shirt with long sleeves, finished off by my red converse and army jacket.
Next i moved on to make-up! I rubbed in enough concealer to cover my cheeks, but there was no way of covering my lip.. guess i would need to come up with an excuse for that as well!
I walked into school, so far, so good! In my first two lessons the teachers only asked if i was feeling better and if everything was ok, but thanks to the many years of practice i have now become a great liar so i answered with a believable yes, but clearly i wasn’t! I couldn’t even wear my backpack with fear of it banging against my back..so i was grateful for not getting any homework!
But what i was truly dreading the most was next period, English... with him.. with the man who had made the last 10 days of my life the worst i had ever experienced and for which the person i hated, nearly as much as Simon. But he was also someone who i loved, whom i lusted! Who sent sparks through my body every time we touched!
I sighed and dragged myself off to next lesson, contemplating if i should just skip it!
I got to English early and sat in my usual seat, waiting for Emma and hoping that today was the day she came back in! I hadn’t seen her since the little glimpse i had of her stood frozen on the stairs with a look of horror on her face as i went to her house to give her her phone back.
That look on her face had haunted my dreams for the last 10 days she has been absent from school! I tried to get information from the school, but even with the connections my father had, all i could get was that there was a family emergency and it was best i didn’t go visit her.
The first bell rang and i snapped out of my nightmare to focus of the rush of students entering the class. My eyes darted to each student, not wanted to miss anyone until my eyes popped wider and my moth dropped as the most beautiful girl, my girl walked through the doors.
Her head was down, and her sexy long brown hair curtained her face from my view, but i knew it was her from her hot petite body, and lush curves. Just the thought of how she felt in my arms sent sparks all over my body.. even more so down to my shaft!
She sat in her usual seat but our eyes never met, i missed looking into her deep green eyes, even though they usually shown fear and pain i still need to see them, they were like a drug to me!
Lesson was going by too quickly because it only consisted of me staring at Emma all the time! I tried to cough and throw paper on her desk to get her attention, but she just continued to write note and keep her head fixed to face the ground... something wasn’t right!
Class ended and everyone ran out to get to lunch, leaving us alone. I think she thought she was alone because she looked more comfortable, more relaxed, it pained me to think that she has to put this wall up around her.. but for now i just need to understand...
The sound of me locking the classroom door had her jump and stop from packing away. She slowly turned to face me, but her head still remained down. I took the first move and walked to her.. not too close but close enough so that she was only an arm length away and still close enough for the smell of vanilla to infiltrate my senses, i had missed that so much!
“Emma... i..i missed you so much! Where have you been? Are you ok?” My questions were just met by silence as we just stood there for a while, no movements.. i couldn’t take it anymore! I needed her to be in my arms again, to be on my lips!
I stretched my arm out and placed my hand under her chin so that i could see her face. The contact with her soft skin sent pleasurable shivers down my spine but they were soon replaced by pain as she slapped my hand away and snapped her head away from me.
My hands balled up into fist by my sides because as she swooped her head away from me, he hair had cleared way for me to see a glimpse of her face.. her eyes where puffy and it was obviously from crying far too much, her cheeks where swollen and pink as they were attempted to be covered. But what shocked me the most was the cut on her lip! Something, or someone had hit MY Emma so hard that it forced her lip to split!!
I was now shaking with anger.. but it was only making Emma more scared of me. So after a few short breaths i had my anger under control, i had to because i needed to put the care of Emma first before i start asking questions and killing the wanker who did this to my baby!
“Who did this to you??” my question was still met by silence. I couldn’t take this anymore! I needed to know!
I quickly closed the space between us held her head between my hand and softly brushed my lips on hers. The sudden skin contact with her had electric shoot through my body! Her lips where so soft and taste so sweet, but i needed more!
I licked her bottom lip, asking for entrance but it wasn’t given! I did it again, but this time i licked over the cut on her lip, she moaned and i quickly took the chance. I slipped my tongue into her mouth, our tongues started to play with each other. I was really getting into the kiss and started to slide my hand around her waist so that there was no space between us.
I pulled away to let oxygen into my lungs, but i still kept a firm grasp of her in my arms. I moved one of my hand up to her head and slowly guided it to my chest so i could hold her safely in my arms, in my protection.
“there, there baby. I‘m not going to let anyone else hurt you!” I couldn’t! That was it, i am never letting her out of my arms again!
Jack brought my head to his hard chest, and his warmth and safeness welcomed me and made me feel protected.
“There, there baby. I’m not going to let anyone else hurt you!” His words were so soothing, and i felt as though they were the truth, could he be the one who could save me?
I leaned into his hard chest and lost control! I cried and cried as i finally felt more comfortable around him, like he was taking the weight of the world off my shoulders.
Next thing i knew, i was being carried, bridal style down the halls of school. I was too embarrassed from my sudden break down i nestled my head further into his neck and gripped tighter onto him...wanting to stay in his warmth. Next we were by his car. He unlocked the door and placed me in the passenger seat. My head rested on the window and i fell into a peaceful sleep under the watch of my protector because i didn't care where we were going. as long as i could stay with Jack, stay in his arms, and on him lips!
Mmmm! Is this heaven? I feel like i’m floating on a cloud, a sweet smelling cloud. I feel so warm and protected, surrounded by the familiar sent of lavender... who does this remind me of?
“m...m...mum?” I thought i had just said that in my head, i guess i’m gaining consciousness and spoke it aloud, noooo! I don’t want to leave this paradise.. what will i return to? Still attached to my bed, awaiting the return of my abusive father?
My mind flashed back to why i was tied up.. because of Jack... because of “LIAM!!” i screamed, jumping myself awake.
I flicked my head around the room, it was big! Blue and black coloured walls... I’M IN JACKS ROOM!! But where’s jack? I lifted the covers and turned to get off the bed when my face met a hard wall pushing me back. I fluttered my sleepy eyes fully open to see no wall, just Jack’s hard chest! Maybe i was in heaven because he looked like an angel, my angel!
“Where do you think you’re going sleepy head!” He smiled, but it wasn’t his usual goofy, handsome smile that split his face from ear to ear, but one with concern, sympathy and anger! "who's liam?"
My eyes popped open at the sound of his name being said. I couldn't talk about him, i didn't deserve to say his name out loud. Unable to look Jack in the eyes i looked down at my fist curled on my lap...
My heart stopped. My sleeve had been rolled up to reveal the marks on my wrist. SHIT!! He continued to stair at me with those puppy dog eyes as i frantically tried to cover the scars. Although i expected sympathy, i was surprised that he wasn’t disgusted by me and even in this situation, my heart fluttered for him.
SHIT! What time is it? I frantically search the room for a clock... 7:45pm!! No no no please tell me that clocks wrong! I jumped off the bed and ran for the door, but only to be met by Jacks arms, circling around my front. I tried to get out of Jacks grasp “you don’t understand i’m late..”
“I know your dad beats you..” Jack whispered and i froze! We must have stayed like this for minutes, hours, days. “i’ve seen...” jack’s voice broke and i felt a tear drop fall on my arm. “I’ve s...seen your wrist! I’m so sorry, baby, i’m so so so sorry! I should have been there!! I.. i should have protected you!”
“why?” i whispered “WHY SHOULD YOU!” why was he saying this? I was angry, i’m sick of empty promises, i don’t need the fake sympathy!... tears warmed my cheeks as they fell and i looked deep into Jacks eyes waiting for the reply, for the reply i’ve been searching for- for long time...
“because i love you, and i will protect you” his words were strong, lifting every worry i had ever thought off my shoulders making them seem like distant memories! He hugged me closer and that’s all i needed to give myself to him, to relax.. its now my turn to act normal!
“thank you..” you’ve done so much, i love you to but i cannot say it to you yet.. but soon! Once i get my heart back together.
He wiped the last of my tears away with a gentle kisses. Moving the kisses to my lips, he gently pressed his lips to mine. His lips were soft and needy, wanting more of me! he brought one arm up to my head to bring our lips closer and i did the same, fisting some of his hair. He gave off a moan in response making me want him! And the way he touched me, sending sparks down my body... completely different from what i feel from when Simon touches me!
As we deepened our kiss he pulled me closer to his body, so close that i could feel his shaft! Hard and horny, pressed against my stomach.. he wanted me just as much as i wanted him!! He moved his kisses down to my jaw then to my neck as he slid his hands down my arms, lifting my wrists to his lips and placed soft and loving kisses over the horrible bloody scars. He then looked down at me, i knew what was coming and i wasn’t going to like it...
“Are there any more?” i couldn’t show him my back... he would really be disgusted then! He’d run to the hills and never look back... and that hurt my heart more than the damage done by Simon, bringing on more tears as i hung my head in shame. “you need to show me.” he hugged me closer, as if he read my mind “don’t worry, i’m not going anywhere!” he rubbed my arms but i still couldn’t believe him. “How about, if i run i’ll give you my Lamborghini!” he started to laugh, instantly lightening the mood and if i didn’t believe it was possible but making me fall further in love with him!
I nodded my head for ‘yes’ as i couldn’t do anything more. I gently pushed his hands away, giving us some space so he could take in the full view! I looked up to see what could be the last time Jack looked at me with love in his eyes and then turned to face my back to him as i lifted up my top to reveal my bare back to him.
A sharp gasp pierced my ears.. great! Now i’ll hear the bedroom door open then slam shut as he’ll never see or talk to me again!
Instead i felt something soft touch my back, tracing a delicate finger over each scar followed by a gentle and warm kiss. The love i felt from Jack’s touch had brought tears to my eyes once again, but this time, they were tears of joy! Of relief.. something i have felt since before my mother’s death. Being with Jack helped me think back to the great times i had with my mother.. with my family all happy!
I didn’t care if i was completely topless, i turned and hugged Jack as hard as i could. Never wanting to let go. At first Jack was taken back by my response but then he wrapped me in his arms and i sniffed in his lavender and man smell... my man’s smell!
*knock knock* We jumped away from each other and i quickly searched for my top as Jack went to unlock his bedroom door. Thank god he closed it!
A older man walked in. He was aging gracefully as his short hair was dark brown, with whisks of white on the sides of this head. As he stepped into the room, his tall 6ft1, muscular body filled the doorway and instantly i could tell he was Jack’s father, but Jack was still taller and far more muscular. They both shared the same defined jaw line, high cheek bones and nicely tanned skin that highlighted their deep blue eyes.
“Hello Emma, my name is Robert Edwards and I am Jack’s father, its nice to finally meet you” Robert took a step closer and extended his hand out to me but instinctively i flinched, pulling my arm up to protect my head.
After a moment of silence, i realised that i hadn’t felt any pain. Slowly moving my hand down and looking around the room, both men were looking at me, both with confusion and sympathy.. i’m starting to get sick of this look!
But as i looked deeper into Roberts eyes, it was making me feel loved... a different kind of love than what i feel from Jack, maybe this is what it’s meant by a fathers love! It consumed me, the unfamiliar feel of being cared for and understanding only a father could give, should give... just once i wanted that- needed that!
I leapt into Roberts arms! Squeezing my arms around his hard waist as his warmth worked its way onto my body and into my heart, this felt right, but not as safe as when i’m with Jack... nothing will ever compare to what i feel from being close to Jack.
At first surprised and confused, it was obvious that without a daughter Robert didn’t receive many hugs but he slowly lifted one hand to my head, stroking and soothing me as the other went to the top of my back, barely touching, Robert didn’t want to hurt me!!! i began to cry into his chest.
We had sat in the Kitchen, for what had seemed like forever but i didn’t mind. I was practically sitting on Jacks lap, we were that close! We had entwined our fingers as we held hands and rested it on my lap. Robert was sitting across from us, now and then looking at our physical show of affection and i caught his lips rise in the corners, i think i had been accepted into the family...
Robert shared funny stories about himself and Jack but i knew at some point we were going to have to talk about my.. situation... shit! “What time is it? Where’s my phone? I need..” I jumped from my seat, frantically jumping around in search for school bag, Simons probably going to crazy but i can’t dare to think what he’ll do to me this time.
“emma! Emma what’s wrong?” they both shouted from down the hall as they tried to keep up with my fast pace.
I found my bag by the front door, picking it up before leaning in for the door handle to leave this paradise... and back to my reality. But in one swift movement i was lifted off my feet and over jacks shoulder, taking me back into the house. I can’t get caught up in their happy lives, i had to face the music back at my hell hold with Simon so i started to kick and scream for my release! There’s no way i can ruin their lives like i ruined Liam’s!!!
“He’s been arrested Emma!”
Well that silenced me. I slid down from his shoulder, but i was weak at my knees and fell hard on my butt! Unable to speak i just shook my head in disbelief! He.. he was arrested!! HE’S GONE! I lifted my head, unable to hide the little smile of relief flicking the corner of my lips up, but before i could celebrate- i had to make sure...
“I don’t believe you..” i whispered
“its true” Jack put his hands under my arms, trying to lift me to my feet but i couldn’t
“come sit down and we’ll talk”
“No!” I wanted to know, but i couldn’t sit calmly! I stood, amazed my feet could keep me standing. “tell me, i need to know what happened!”
Jack and his father exchanged looks before looking back to me, “well..” Jack rubbed the back of his neck, “When I got you back here before, you were asleep so i took you to my room. When i laid you down i.. i saw your wrist” Jack swallowed hard and slammed his eyes shut, not being able to cope with the pain.. my pain. “I then lifted your sleeves to see the scars... i was so angry at him, at myself! I shouldn’t have let it gone on as long as it has!” He now had me in his hold and i welcomed the protection it gave me.
“i’m sorry” he whispered softly into my ears.
Robert cleared his throat, i blushed and turned my attention away from Jack.
“After that i was called, i hope you don’t mind dear..” I shook my head for 'no', i didn't mind Robert looking at my arms because i knew he couldn't hurt me. Robert continued and Jack never left my side, nor removed his hands on my waist. “After i had looked at your wrist, face and neck we called for a doctor and someone who specialises in...” Robert flicked his gaze from mine and over to Jack then back, almost apologising for his next words, “Child abuse..”
The new information just carried on shocking me, i don't know what happened next, all i saw was just black and then my legs gave in. I would have fallen to the floor, if it not have been for the strong arms keeping me on my feet.
Before i passed out completely i could hear Jack and Robert shouting and shaking me but my body wouldn't respond no matter how much i wanted to see Jack again... so he can comfort me through the pain.
I woke to the sound to two men talking, but no matter how hard i tried my body wouldn't listen to me and wouldn't fully wake so i decided to just lay there and listen to the conversation.
"What did the doctor say?" One of the men said as he slid his hand into mine. I knew that voice, it was Jack, my Jack! Knowing he was close comforted me and i felt safer.
"He said she fainted due to the little food she has eaten and the sudden shock from the information we told her on her weak body, but with rest and by feeding regularly she'll be fine in a week" He sounded similar to Jack, it must be Robert.
"That's good" Jack sighed heavily "So what do we do now? When do we go to court?"
"I called in my good friend Kyle Washington, the lawyer and he said if we have strong enough evidence and get Emma to testify then Simon will be locked up for a long time!" I could hear the smile on Roberts face and i was grateful that Robert and Jack were tring so hard to help me.
Jacks grip got tighter and he stroked some hair off my face, "I don't think she'll be up to testifying, to see her father again!"
"I know, but if we want to make sure he stays behind bars for a long time and to keep Emma safe, the court need to know what really happened and that can only be told from Emma."
There was a long pause before Jack answered, He was trying to think of the pro's and con's, "fine!" He breathed out it admittance.
I could hear their plan, but i had no say in the matter! Jack was right, i don't think i could face Simon again! and what if i don't provide enough evidence and he didn't go to prison!! Then i would have to go back home with him! I can never go anywhere again with Simon, not now, after i have experienced what true love is, both from Jack and his father.
I tried again to move my hand or at least a finger, but i was still too weak and fell back into a deep sleep.
I woke again but i still had no control over my body, so i listened to what sounded like Jack and Robert shouting to each other.
"Its been 3 days now and she still hasn't woke!"
"just give it time son, she's just getting her strength back. She will wake when she's ready, she's been through a lot and i'm surprise she had lasted as long as she did."
Jack couldn't respond to what his father had said, but instead he just thought long and hard about it. I then felt the bed sink next to me and Jacks arm go around my neck as he laid next to me. I wanted to lean in and cuddle up to his warm body, but my damn body wouldn't let me!
I heard the bedroom door open then shut as Robert left. After a moment i felt a hot breath against my neck and Jacks lips brush against my ear,
"Emma please wake up, i miss your deep emerald eyes look into mine, i miss the way you softly touch me with you're soft, gentle hands. I miss the way you fit perfectly in my arms as i hold you close to me and the way your lips feel, no, the way they belong on mine! please wake Emma so i can say this to you! I need you to know how you make me feel, how much i love you"
His words made my heart skip a beat then thump a million times faster! then i worried, what if i didn't wake up! i had missed the chance to tell Jack just how much i love him! please god if you're listening for once, if you let me wake up then i will tell Jack how i truly feel!
please body move! MOVE! i begged my body and tried to move, but my body was just too tired!
I whispered how i truly felt about her in her ear, hoping that it might wake her, and that she might feel the same... someday.
I held her close to me, thinking about how little time we had spent together, yet every moment i have spent with her, was the first time i felt whole, like i felt just right and having her in my arms again i can never let her go!
I was pulled from my heavenly thoughts by what felt like Emma’s hand move...
“Emma?...” From hearing my voice she had moved her hand and fingers more! “EMMA!!”
Tears of happiness fell from my eyes! I sat up next to her to get a better look, so i knew my eyes weren’t playing tricks on me... showing me what i wanted! But there it was again... she moved her hand.
I leapt to my bedroom door and shouted down to my father, but i needed to return to Emma’s side. When i sat down again she was moaning in... pain? It made me sad that i couldn’t help the woman i love! all i could do was move the hair from her face and gently stroke her cheeks, making her calmer and showing her that i am here, and never leaving her side.. never again.
As my father entered the room with the doctor, he moved around to her left as i was being stubborn and not moving from where i was sitting! He checked her pulse and vitals, before turning to us,
“She has improved greatly in the last couple of days, and i can say that she will be awake by tomorrow latest.” We all sighed with relief “We’ll keep her on the drip to build up her strength, but by tomorrow she’ll be able to eat on her own. I’ll be back by then to check up on her”
Robert shook the doctor’s hand before showing him out and giving me and Emma some privacy. I felt sorry for being rude to the doctor, not even asking his name, but the worry i feel for Emma has completely taken over me!
I got comfortable on my bed again, laying next to Emma. I curved my arm around her neck and hugged her until i fell asleep with her sweet vanilla smell calming me and ensuring me that tomorrow when i awake, so would she...
Ughhhh! I feel like shit! Everything hurts, every little movement... wait i have movement!! I wiggled my fingers and toes and then i moved onto the bigger limbs, just taking it easy! I twisted my stiff neck around then shook my legs, but when i tried to move my arms and body.. it felt as if i was being restrained!
I fluttered my eyes open, and at first they were blurry as i got use to the sunlight entering the room. When i focused i saw an angel fast asleep next to me! I took the in the handsome sight of Jack a sleep, and for once i saw him defenceless, for once i had the upper hand and it made me smiled that he would feel so relaxed around me, enough to fall asleep with me!
My eyes traveled down to see what was restricting my movements and my heart melted at the sight of Jacks protective arm around my waste... i felt so comfortable, wrapped in his Lavender shield. I could take on the world with him at my side!.. but i’m not sure about seeing Simon again! Just the thought of him ruins the happy mood i feel when i’m with Jack.
Before i could realise, i hot tears burned my cheeks and i had pushed away from jack. I didn’t want to mix the life i have and want with Jack with the one i so desperately try to escape from Simon. I turn to the other side of the bed and hug my knees to my chest.. already missing the warmth of Jacks hold!
I felt the bed move and Jacks protectiveness covered me once more! I welcomed the warmth it gave me and i uncontrollably relaxed in his hold. He lent his head down to mine, and he brushed my ear with his lips... casing me to react by heat rushing to my cheeks and my face turning the colour of a tomato!
“don’t think you can get away from me that easily” I could tell Jack was still half asleep as he whispered into my ear... but i could help but fall for this man more!
I giggled and i could feel his smile as he leaned closer to me. He placed a soft kiss on my neck, sending sparks throughout my body.
After spending a gorgeous and memorable morning, cuddled up with Jack, my stomach had ruined the moment by growling at its emptiness. I didn’t want to move, laying like this was... amazing! And i jokingly moaned when Jack was shaking me, trying to make me to get up! We both broke out into laughter, but before i knew i was in jack’s arms and he was taking me down stairs, bridal style!!
As he walked me down the halls, i took the chance to snuggle into his chest and inhale the smell of lavender i am more than too fond of!
Next thing i knew Jack had slipped me onto the Kitchen counter, dragging me from my daydream. He asked the Kitchen staff if they could leave us alone for a while then made his way to where i was sitting. It was only now that i had noticed that he looked like hell, but still hot! How does he do this!!
It looks like he hasn’t shaven for a while, and the bags under his eyes show he hasn’t slept either! Had he stayed up sitting next to me?
He rested his hands on the counter, one on each side of me and leaned in closer.
“What would you like to eat?” He lifted his arms to emphasise the huge kitchen we were in, with the many cabinets containing truck loads of food, “I can make you anything!”
I smiled at his attempts to make me happy, but i judged whether he could actually make me anything... “erm...”
“anything at all..” he repeated
“erm... i don’t know, i don’t mind..... erm... how about pancakes?”
“With strawberries and cream and syrup and butter and..”
“sure!” i had to stop him, otherwise i would get full just off him listing the food!
I had to give in! There was just too much food to consume!!
With still half of my food still on my plate, Jack looked at me concerned and angry. I knew he wanted me to eat more, but i just couldn’t possibly!
He has surprised me though, his cooking skills were amazing, the pancakes melted in my mouth! they were fluffy and sweet, does this man have any faults?
We sat in silence for a moment.. and i could see Jack fidgeting, twiddling his thumbs, thinking hard about what he was going to say next,
“Emma... erm... can i ask you something?"
I froze! What could he possibly want to ask me!? I didn’t want him to find out any more than he already knows, i didn’t want him to hate me, to feel disgusted by me, to leave me!! But i wanted us to get closer so i regreatedly nodded for ‘yes’
He took a sharp inhale and looked up from his thumbs and deep into my eyes. “Who’s Liam?”
His words rung in my ears... ‘who’s liam? Who’s liam? WHO’S LIAM!!!’ the words brought tears to my eyes, and i cried uncontrollably, burning my cheeks with their down fall!
I was crying so hard that i don’t know when Jack had lifted me and put me on his lap, hugging me close to him and whispering in my ear, “I’m sorry baby, shhh shhh shhh, please don’t cry! If you don’t want to tell me, you don’t have to. I’m sorry baby!” He repeated over and over until i had calmed into a whimper.
I should tell him, telling him would bring us closer! If he would stay with me after finding out about Simon then he might stay after hearing about Liam... please God, let him stay!
I sniffed and attempted to wipe my eyes dry, but to no success as tears continued to fall. I lifted my head to look Jack in the eyes, was he really ready he hear this, was i?
I took i big inhale, “H..h...he was my... my f..f..first.... my first... boyfriend....” My voice was barely audible, that i hardly heard myself but i still felt Jack tense up under me, my first reaction was to look at Jack to see how he responded. But he continued to give me a look of complete love and understanding!
He didn’t say anything, but i knew he wanted me to continue..
“I was 15... my father had been... been r...raping since i was 14 and had told me that he should be the only man for me..” At this new information, Jack had taken an inhale of air and held me closer. “Then after he r..raped me.. he said no man would ever want to love me after what i had done... i felt disgusted by myself, let alone what a man would think of me..” I covered my mouth, the sadness taking the better of me and i began to cry again.
After being comforted by Jack, and getting control of myself again, i continued..
“Then i met Liam, he was kind, gentle, loving.. he was in my English class, and shared the same love i had for poetry so we would talk for hours!” at the memory of Liam and the love i felt, and still feel for him made me unconsciously smile. I looked over to Jack, looking in his eyes i could see.. jealousy? Over how i felt about Liam?
I shook my head and carried on...
“When he asked me out, i felt like the luckiest girl around... i felt normal.. until i stupidly though i would introduce him to Simon! I waited till the knight i knew he would be home before me.. i opened the front door, hand in hand with Liam.. and the look on Simon’s face.. i instantly knew i had just led a lamb into a lions cage! Why was i so stupid..” my words had now become whispers as i dove deeper into my memories- i was starting to feel sick! Other than in my nightmares this was the first time i had recalled the horrible events of that night...
“Simon just lost it! He started screaming for Liam to get out over and over again, but he wouldn’t, he wanted to stay with me.. he wanted to make sure i was safe being left alone with Simon, but i knew the longer Liam stayed there the less i would be safe and the less he would be safe also, so i said goodbye and forced him out the house.. then... then.. Simon.. he... force me to.. and then he wiped me, casing the older scars on my back”
I could see the pain i was feeling in Jack’s eyes also, as if what i was telling him, pained him as much as it did me! He kissed me on both my cheeks, kissing away the tears and some of the pain. He cupped my cheeks and was about to speck until he looked confused about something... like he was working something out, but then it was replaced by anger.. “How many times has he hurt you like that?”
How many times has he wiped my back till there was no skin left!! “only twice, that time with Liam... and then before i was off school for a week”
“you mean the night i brought you your phone?” Jack was now whispering as he figured out that he was the cause of the last wiping i got... i nodded for ‘yes’
His face looked lost! He felt a mixture of sad, angry, sorry and sympathetic. He started to shake with anger at Simon, but more so at himself... I cupped his face in my hands, guiding his eyes to mine and rubbed away one his tears with my thumb,
“Listen, this is not your fault at all! You didn’t know! And Simon is.. he’s a fucking prick!!!”
It felt good to call Simon bad names.. kind of made me feel happier! Ha!
“its my fault, i knew how Simon would react.. but i still insisted on bringing Liam home... i’m the one that did this to him, i’m the reason he’s in hospital!”
Jacks head shot up to the word hospital, “What did Simon do to him..?” It seemed to surprise Jack at what Simon was capable.. but i understood well what Simon could do!
“I don’t know what happened.. but next thing i knew Liam was in intensive care on life support because he had been in some kind of ‘accident’ and was in a coma! I never really found out because his family always hated me... and Simon forbidden me from going to see him! But i knew it was Simon fault because that night- i had seen him the happiest i had seen him for a long time.. it sickened me!!”
We both sat in silence for a while, until i felt tired from sharing the information i had kept a secret for a long time and the bucket load of tears i had cried! I rested my head in the base of Jacks neck. Breathing in the enticing smell of lavender, helping me into a relaxed sleep! Jack lifted one of his arms from my waist and up to my head, stoking and brushing my hair until i fell asleep... mmmmm, i could get use to this... use to being in Jacks protective arms, safe from the world around us!
A week has passed since i told Jack about Liam and today was the day.. the day that could decide whether i would never see Simon again!! But worries kept flooding my mind all week.. what if there isn’t enough evidence? What if Simon is let free and i would have to go back and live with him...
Jack put his hand at the small of my back, leading my to the car parked outside. The drive to the court hearing was silent and I appreciated it as it let my mind wonder, it let me think about what the plan for today was even though I didn’t want to think about it anymore.. about Simon anymore.. but I had to. I didn’t want Simon to see me broken, I didn’t want him to win.. so I kept taking deep breaths to try and calm myself down but the further we left the safety of Jack’s home and closer to the court the worse my breathing got!
To distract myself, I mentally made a plan in my head…
‘ok you can do this Emma!
1. Walk into court
2. Act strong, its going to be hard, but I have to! If I’m going to be in front of Simon again… I have to show him he can’t intimidate me.. not ever again!
3. Speak my case
4. show evidence….
SHIT! I have more evidence!!’ Thinking back, I do have more evidence I could show the court and secure Simon’s prison sentence.
I snap my head to Jack, who’s sitting in the back seats with me, his arm around my waste and our hands entwined.
“There’s more evidence!” I exclaimed to Jack. He looked at me confused, and I would be to if he had just randomly sprung this on me. I turned to Robert, who was driving us,
“Quickly go to my home.. there’s something I need to get!” I told Robert, almost an order to which he complied straight away. He sharply turned off the motorway, in the direction to my old house.
We pulled up outside my house, it had seemed like an eternity since I had last been here and to be honest, I thought I would never have to come back! But there was one last thing I needed to do before I could completely blank out this part of my life.
I didn’t even bother wanting to get my clothes or belongings because they reminded me of him… also the things I had were either old or broken, Simon didn’t get me anything..
But that miserable memory made me smile, because then it made me think about the clothes I had on now, clothes that Jack and his father had gotten for me! Everything was designer.. smooth to the touch! When Jack walked in to my new bedroom in their house, one of the many guest rooms they had! with all the bags containing my new belongings I began to cry.. I know I have been crying a lot these days, but these were happy tears! It was the first time someone had bought me something… because they just wanted to..
I walked into my old bedroom.. it was a mess! I guess when I didn’t come home Simon had trashed my room in anger, I kind of expected worse! Shit the camera!!
I frantically search the room, “please be ok, please be ok” I repeated in my head.. hoping that it wasn’t damaged from Simon’s rampage, or worse, he had found it and destroyed it!! I went to where I usually hid it, behind my headboard on my bed.. I had to lift the mattress and pick up the table that usually sat next to my bed.
My heart sank!..... It was still there! I sighed, a deep sigh of relief…
I picked it up and quickly flicked through the pictures to make sure that they were still all there. As I clicked from picture to picture I felt sick to my stomach! All the abuse I had experienced since the age of 15.. I felt sorry for myself!
I stopped, closed my eyes and tried to fight back the tears! ‘no Emma! You can’t cry because Simon anymore!! In a couple of hours he will be out of our lives forever!!’ I told myself..
I hadn’t heard anyone walk into my room but when I felt Jacks arms around me and his warm body press into my back I let myself go. I turned and fell into his chest and cried.
After a minute or two Jack spoke, “We really need to get going, come on…” he whispered softly as he pulled away. I missed him, his touch, but he was right… we needed to get this over with.
We were only 5 minutes away from the court when Jack leaned in to me and kissed me on my cheek, bringing me from my trance I didn’t know I was in. I turned to him, putting a fake smile on my face that I knew he could see right through me but it was the best I could do. He smiled back, but I could see the hint of worry on his face.
As we pulled up outside the court house, I tried to think of an escape plan, I don’t think I could do this! Maybe if I just run… Simon wouldn’t be able to find me..
Jack reached out and gently placed his hand in mine and my thoughts had gone! How could I possibly run away.. how, when I have Jack. He brought me strength, enough for me to get out the car and make my way into the court room.. this was it… the make or break point..
Court had been going on for 11 days now, and it was coming to the end. I never thought it would drag on this much and it was physically, mentally and emotionally draining the life from me! I have not been able to sleep or eat properly the whole time.. meaning neither had Jack. I felt sorry for him for falling in love with a broken girl!
When I would scream from the nightmares or refuse to eat Jack would be there to comfort me and force me to eat. In the end I had moved from the guest room and back into Jack’s.
I was upset when I moved into the guest room, so moving back into his comforted me.. the nights I spent curled up with Jack, hugged tight to his warm chest had been the best nights I have had the whole time! I actually slept through the nights!
It was the last day of the court hearing, FINALLY!!
On the way to court, a journey we all knew too well, it was silent from the nerves we all had. We knew we had won this, after showing my back and pictures to the jury it had made a few of them cry and all gave me sympathy looks.. I had won them over! But even with that I still feared that there was a chance he could get away with it!!
The hearing was dragging, it had only been an hour.. but it felt like a life time! Every tick of the clock, every cough from the audience, every drop of rain on the window had become louder and more annoying as we waited for the jury to make their decision.
The silence in the room was cut off and the door squeaked open and in came the jury … this was it! My mouth went dry, hands sweaty and my heart seemed to have stopped beating altogether..
“All rise…” The judge said as he read the slip in his hand. He looked down at me then over to Simon..
Simon looked worse than I did, he hadn’t shaven for a while, he looked like he also hadn’t slept for a long time and during the time we were in court, each day he had fresh bruises on his face… I guess the other prisoners had found out why he was there, many of them are very strong about family values! Ha!
“The jury have decided the defendant, Simon Ross Wilson, has been found…” He paused… the anticipation had me gripping tighter on Jacks hand.. was the judge playing a joke with me?? This was not funny, not now!! “Guilty, He must serve his time in a high security prison for the duration of 25 years..”
I blacked out the rest.. what did he say? He’s guilty, guilty, FUCKING GUILTY!!!! A smile split my face, I turned and jumped into Jacks arms and I could hear his laugh, his deep sexy laugh and I joined him! Jack put me down and in the corner of my eye I saw Simon being led out.. finally I would never have to see that man, never ever again!!!
The weeks after Simon had been sentenced had gone quickly.. It was filled with me and Jack spending a lot of time together! We slept together.. ate together.. went to school and even went on dates. We had even started talking about the college we would go to together as school was ending in a couple of weeks. Seeing how happy it made Jack to spend time with me, made me happier… I even started to sit with him and his gang at school, although I didn’t like it, I hated it almost, but I could see Jack was happy goofing around with his friends so I began to love it to.
Once the girls at school realised that it wasn’t just a fling between me and Jack and that he was announcing me as his girlfriend.. they started to give me less evil look and some even became good friends!
“Hay Emma!!” Jack was shouting me from down the hall. I turned on my heal and he almost crashed into me, he was running that quick!
“Um…hi..” I mumbled, still not able to look people properly in the eyes yet. Jack saw my discomfort and put his hand under my chin, guiding my emerald eyes to his sexy deep blue eyes that were filled with the love and warmth he felt towards me.. I instantly relaxed.
He leaned in, pressing his lush pink lips to mine. The kiss was starting to get rougher and deeper, but he pulled away. I gave off a little moan.. I wanted more of him…
His eyes where still closed, savouring our touch and exhaled from my moan.
“Go out with me tonight…” He asked, but it felt more like an order. I looked up from his lips to his eyes. Why did this Greek like god love me? How? It was also kind of hard to tell him I had other plans because I had no other friends, or that I was busy at home.. because we live together!
“erm… ok.. where?”
“its a surprise!!” He was so excited, basically bouncing off the walls! He grabbed my
hand, entwining our fingers and leading us off to English.. today couldn’t go any better.
I got dressed into a little dark blue dress that came just a little above my knee, and came down to show a little of my cleavage.. not what I’m use to wearing, but now that I don’t have to cover and hide any scars, I suppose this is what girls my age wear on dates…
I curled my hair and put on a little mascara before slipping into some black flat shoes and walking to the floor length mirror. My room was just like Jack’s, just a little smaller and painted cream and brown, and had accessories added to indicate that a girl was sleeping in here. In the mirror, I was quite shocked at the woman looking back at me… I looked completely different than what I use to. I had been fully rested so my eyes sparked more than usual. My cheeks were rosy, and had a healthy glow from the nutrition of regular meals I am now eating, also making my brown hair more golden and silky smooth.
“wow” jack gasped, I turned to find him leaning on the door frame of my bedroom, dressed in a pair of breath-taking black suit pants with a smart top and the top two buttons were undone, revealing just a little of his hard chest. He was looking at me from head to toe, licking his lips as he desired what he saw.
He walked closer to me and wrapped his arms around my waist, but still held me at arm’s length so he could admire more of what he saw, and I did the same.. how could such an amazingly hot man love me?!
He leaned closer to me, his breath hot on my lips as I waited for him to close the gap between us, but he didn’t! He staid still, only a centimetre gap between our lips touching.. it was driving me crazy!
ahhh! That’s it, he wants me to make the move.. it has always been him to make the first move.... but I’m scared! I lifted my hands to the side of his cheeks to make sure he didn’t leave me so I wouldn’t make a fool of myself. My cheeks flushed from embarrassment but he looked amusingly shocked by my bold moves, but kept still. I closed the gap between us and our lips touched!
It was gentle at first as we tasted each other’s lips then I became hungrier, and I could feel he was to as he licked my bottom lip, asking for entrance into my mouth and I more than happily gave it to him. My tongue explored his mouth, he tasted sweat and I wanted more!
His hand moved to the back of my head and I did the same to try and close the gap between us but Jack pulled away! No! we were both trying to catch our breath.. wow he was such a great kisser!
“We should get going” Jack said breathing hard. Oh I missed that breath mingled with mine! But I straightened up myself, trying to compose myself, then we made our way downstairs.
“So where are we going?” I asked curiously to which he responded with his handsome smile,
“now, it wouldn’t be much of a surprise if I told you that!” His reply made me smile and we both fell into laughter as we got into his car parked at the front of the house.
We pulled up into a magnificent court yard, with a Greek mythology fountain in the centre, I awed at how beautiful it looked as we parked up and walked towards the building. From what I could see, the building was magnificent! It had a hint of an Italian look to it, with cream coloured walls and wood framed window and doors. Topiary circular shaped plants stood at either side of the doorway, at the end of a mini red carpet. Jack reached out for my hand and we walked down the red carpet and into the doorway.
Although it was a small restaurant, it was quite busy. The interior was just as grand as the exterior design, with warm colours used to create a welcoming and romantic atmosphere. We walked up to a man calmly rushing around to seat the people waiting at the front to be seated, it’s a shame, we will have to wait before we get seated.
We didn’t go to the counter with the other customers who hadn't book a table five years in advance either, instead, Jack winked at the man and we walked straight past them. Did Jack know them?
The man introduced himself, “Hello, My name is William. Would you please follow me to your seats.” He announced himself confidently, but still friendly with a huge smile on his face, highlighting the laughter line by his eyes and mouth. His black three piece suit was immaculate and well kept, the cliché waiter style.. I giggled to myself.
I could see no vacant seat available, and the deeper we walked into the restaurant.. the more I was worried that there was actually no seats. As we swerved other customers at their tables, Most of the customers that looked like regulars gave Jack a nod, or hello.
How well known was jack and his family.. I knew they were very rich… but knowing such people, people that looked so rich and powerful!
Then some of the non-regulars, the men gave me lustful looks, and the women did the same to Jack.. I was beginning to get jealous! He’s my man ladies.. back off!
We continued to walk, until we got to the back of the restaurant- to the back doors I was confused at what Jack was thinking. The room we were in was mostly glass, roof to floor and even the back doors where glass. William slid the doors to the side, opening our entrance to the most picturesque view! As the doors slid open, my mouth dropped to the floor! In the view there was green mountains in the background, a quiet still lake at the bottom of wooden stairs and there was our table, by the river- lit up by candles on the table and all over the surrounding floor! There must have been thousands of candles illuminating our path way, covered with rose petals.
Jack looked at me and laughed at my shocked expression. He lifted my chin up so our eyes met, He leaned in and softly placed his lips on mine.. wow this man was amazing! The things he could do, the power he had… wow!
Jack’s grip on my hand go tighter as he guided me to my table, ordered the food and told all the staff fluttering around us to leave. We sat there alone, gazing into each other’s eyes and although it was silent, it wasn’t awkward nor scary, not anymore, not with Jack!
“Emma… since the first moment I had saw you, in our first English class together, I saw a sexy girl staring at me from the corner of the room..” crap he saw me staring at him! Embarrassed my cheeks turned red and I looked at my empty plate. “those loving, sexy and sad emerald eyes looked deep into mine, and from then I haven’t been able to get you out of my mind.. I didn’t want you out of my mind!” he landed forward and softly held my hand, I lifted my head, bringing up my eyes to meet his “When you were sad, it made me feel hurt and it broke my heart, making me so sick that I couldn’t help you! but when you are happy, when you laugh at little things and think no one can hear you, it makes my heart skip a beat! Every emotion you show, and even those that you try and hide make me fall more in love with you even more than I think is possible!” Jack stood up and got out from his chair then went to the side of the table, closer to me. Our eyes never leaving each other’s, “Emma, when I hold you in my arms… when we kiss or even if we’re just holding hands, it fells… right! Being with you Emma makes me whole and I don’t know where I would be without you!” Jack knelt on the floor, separating our hands to retrieve a small box from his pocket.. “Emma Wilson, will you be my wife?”
WHAT!?! I just looked at Jack shocked and confused… does he really want to spend the rest of his life with me? I looked down into his puppy dog eyes, so big and full of life and love! Wow, this man was so hot! And so I was confused more as to why he would want to spend the rest of his life with me!
He had been there with me as I was dragged through hell and back, he had seen me at my worse, comforted and loved me all the way, never leaving my side… I never want him to ever leave my side!!
“I love you!” I whispered.. the first time I have ever told Jack, or anyone for that matter that I loved them… I smiled, a genuine warm smile and he returned it but 100 times better!
“Is that a yes?....”
I jumped into his arms, forcing him to fall back and we fell on the floor laughing. I hugged onto him tight, taking advantage of the chance to be close with him. I lifted my head from his hard chest and leaned up so that I was only inches from his face, from his lips.. I leaned further until our lips touched!
His hand moved from my back, to the back of my head pushing my lips harder onto his as the kiss deepened and became rougher! He licked my bottom lip, asking for entrance to which I gladly gave to him. Our tongues played together and explored each other’s mouth.
I could feel jack starting to get hard beneath me and I broke away from the kiss, laughing!
“haha, yes! I would love to marry you Mr Jack Edwards”
“You have made me the happiest man in the world, future Mrs Emma Edwards!!”
(so that's it folks! I hope you have enjoyed my book.. and I hope you like the ending!! thank you sooo much for reading my first book! xxxxxxxx)
Texte: All contence belongs to me!
Bildmaterialien: Cover image is the work from Cookies&Carrots
Tag der Veröffentlichung: 16.02.2013
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This is for my sister and best friend Chloe who has always been there for me ^^ 110