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Billionaire's Obsession

Billionaire's twins Von:
User: winnersho
Billionaire's Obsession

she dropped her bouquet of blood red roses, turned and ran out of the cathedral and his life. two years later succesful multibillionaire Alejandro Montenegro set out to hunt his ex with the sole purpose of destroying the empire her family had created only to be hit with a bombshell a story of love, family, twins and broken promises

love, lust, twins, family
Beiträge und Kommentare
Wichtiger Beitrag
Gary J Duree

Just a suggestion.

She looked up the stairs leading to the cathedral. Taking a deep breath to calm her nerves as she considered what she was about to do. Without the permission of her parents, she was about to be married. Nothing before in her life had she done without the consent of her parents. She was getting married to the son of her parent’s mortal enemies for some reason. She didn’t understand why, because they never... mehr anzeigen

Wichtiger Beitrag
Gary J Duree

Please understand, I am not an editor, or an Eglish major. I liked your story. There is a place for long sentences, and you have some very long ones. They can have a point, but if to long you can lose your purpose and audiance. I'd suggest you take a look and break you paragraphes down, make your reader feel what you are trying to relay. Keep the faith, I just posted my first book. I have one on Amazon. It freaks me out.

Wichtiger Beitrag
Gelöschter User

Great book

1 Kommentar

thank you, i'm adding updates to the chapters

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