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Leaving Marineris

Von:
Leaving Marineris
Patterson is sleeping. Deep REM. The loop plays itself again, over and over and over. Something different this time, however. An oddity. A foreshadowing...

Beiträge und Kommentare
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Marcar

good writing, need a good plot and story to go with it.

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mysterywriter723

Great story, with thorough descriptions to set the scene. It sounds like a place I wouldn't mind spending some time on a vacation. I liked the image of two beings floating together in space. Was his spirit with her and his body on earth? I wasn't sure at the end. You should definitely be writing novels. Your talent extends to many genres.

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Glynis Rankin

Nicely done ... Flash science fiction, I would have loved to read more about this, you had me caring about the characters in just a few words. Well done....sorry I wasn't around to vote on this.

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mysterywriter723

I enjoyed your descriptions in this story. They were rich and vivid, depicting a dream sequence that drew me in. I thought the ending was mysterious and it offered a glimpse of astral projection or something similar. You are very talented, Pat. Thank you for sharing.

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S.P. Johnson Jr.

Three cheers for flash sci-fi! Well done, sir. A wonderful atmosphere of melancholy and intrigue permeated the story throughout.

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indie23

Coming to the end of the story, reminded me of the movie, Flatliners, I think that's what it was called, with Julia Roberts, Kevin Bacon and Keifer Sutherland. It was a good movie too. :)

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Gelöschter User

Good writing there Patrick. Great descriptive work. Good prose. Well done.

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Vigilant_One

Couldn't find anything wrong with this. Like most of the flash-fiction entries, it sounds like the beginning of something wonderful. Your originality was superb; crafting a landscape that was outlandish and incredible. The premise was good too. Excellent polish and style.

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