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Sophia
Tobias has a huge crush on his best friend's, Nina, fraternal twin sister. Her name is Sophia. Let's just say she has a crazy gangbanging boyfriend who bullies Tobias.


Dieses Buch ist Teil der Reihe "Namesake"
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Sophia
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Chris-Jean

A very detailed account.
I would suggest starting a new line each time a new character speaks to make it easier for the reader. Also consider chapters or sub-headings.
Although, the reader can sense Tobias' struggles & pain, use the opportunity to draw the reader in more by describing it in words.
I will deffinitely read more of your work, & intend the above comments as a means to strengthening & supporting your work.-This story... mehr anzeigen

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Wichtiger Beitrag
arkmeans

OK so, I'm liking what I've read so far. I like the characters and Tobias's struggles are so common, with school, his weight and crushing on the girl of his bully. So far I think that this is a story that all can relate to. I have saved it to my favorites to read more later.

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Kein Miniaturbild Entfernen Bitte wähle einen Grund aus Bitte gib die Stelle im Buch an. de de_DE