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Bear- hug

A short story Von:
User: mangal
Bear- hug
Summer-night experiences of a group of seven college students.

Stichwörter: 
Jungle, hill, Bear, Summer, NIGHT
Beiträge und Kommentare
Wichtiger Beitrag
thadius147

Sir, I read this with interest. I feel the story does not flow or lend itself to pace. Abit more characterisation would be helpful and some editing useful. I have also written a short story perhaps I could send it to You for Your Comments. Thanks! Thadius 147.

Wichtiger Beitrag
thadius147

While a good story, there are a few points I feel need attention. Page 15 Concession in fare, perhaps, reduction in cost, would add to flow.Page 19
Perhaps, Outlined instead of chalked. Page 24. Pehaps, The moon had risen.Page 26 Perhaps , Use, to date, not, till date.

Wichtiger Beitrag
thadius147

While a good story, there are a few points I feel need attention. Page 15 Concession in fare, perhaps, reduction in cost, would add to flow.Page 19
Perhaps, Outlined instead of chalked. Page 24. Pehaps, The moon had risen.Page 26 Perhaps , Use, to date, not, till date.

Wichtiger Beitrag
mangal

Thanks a lot. Ialso want to thank all my readers and the critics for taking time in pointing out the merits and demerits of the work.
mangal

Wichtiger Beitrag
nirmi1967

I am a new comer to this site.I am surprised by the theme and standard of your writing. Definitely different from the crowd, and enjoyable

Wichtiger Beitrag
etelizabeth

Thanks for sharing your talent, I love to step into another imaginative world! Elizabeth

Wichtiger Beitrag
sonti82

Behind the simple story telling, there runs some deeper observations.Thought provoking, I feel.

Wichtiger Beitrag
spkundu

Bear-hug of lovers is much stronger than the embrace of other blind forces!!!

Wichtiger Beitrag
drdwijesh

The boys and the girls found love in the face of grave danger, which turned out to be no danger at all. I liked.

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