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Crime Drama

User: jacki137
Crime Drama
Another cold and rain filled night in the lonely city. He hates nights like these but then he hates most nights, especially when murder lies waiting in a dark alley. My second entry for the Flash Fiction contest - (October-December 2012) - 355 words

Crime, drama, murder
Beiträge und Kommentare
Wichtiger Beitrag
♥ davebccanada ♥

Impressive twist, Jack. Aside from that I am impressed by your ability to convey a lot of information in few words. I could learn a lot from you, sir.

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J.C. Laird

Excellent presentation and description. A perfect example of how flash fiction should be. Short and sweet with a power packed ending. The headaches from the 'unanswered question' saved me from losing the ending (I think). Anyway, good enough for a vote from me.

Wichtiger Beitrag

I love the attention to details. Great descriptions draws you into the story. I found myself mesmerized and lulled into the thoughts of the character, I never saw the end coming. Masterfully crafted. Flash Fiction at its best!

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Backwood writer

i read your flash story well done, certainly your skill in telling this with few words may just win you the contest,
good writng and good day sir
Stanley Mcqueen the only
hill billy writer on here, hope we can be friend i am 61 in a few day 62 like you..

Wichtiger Beitrag

You succeeded admirably. Right up to the end, I thought...but a wickedly nice surprise ending!
The little things...the water seeping through his shoes, his introspective, almost detached thoughts...combine to make this a winner by anyone's standards.

Wichtiger Beitrag

I am not sure what you didn't understand in this fine piece of writing.

RBG - a light rain is a light rain. Rain that comes down softly. It is an expression that is used all the time.

Yes, he is the bad guy. He doesn't know why he does what he does -- maybe the headaches cause the urge to kill. When you are a killer who is intelligent, perhaps you need to figure out WHY you are doing what you do. Who knows why he checked out... mehr anzeigen

Wichtiger Beitrag

Although well written, I too was confused. Why was he so concerned about the motive...about taking note of the passing car and it's features....and then going out to seek another victim?

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A really terrific crime story, short sweet and very sly.

I could feel the drizzle coming down I was so into the story right to the last word.

Every syllable was superb!

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