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Angels On Earth

Book One Von:
User: Daisuke
Angels On Earth

 Nagato Honda is an orphan and she lives in a tent on a property that belongs to a rich family, but when they find her living in the tent, they let her live with them, when a landslide happens and smashes into the tent, she goes into histeria! What will happen to Nagato?



Dieses Buch ist Teil der Reihe "Angels On Earth"
Alle Bücher dieser Reihe:
Angels On Earth
Book One
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Angels on Earth
Book Two (Updating)
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Stichwörter: 
Love, Drama, Family
Beiträge und Kommentare
Wichtiger Beitrag
Lorian Lilsiel

Good story line, really promising. Just some basic grammar and spelling stuff, nothing nobody else doesn't have. One thing though, you might want to tone down the exclamation marks. They loose meaning if every sentence ends in one. Some parts seem to move a little fast, or just not sound right. Nothing a little re-reading can't fix. Some parts get confusing. For example, it is possible I missed it, but what is the amethyst... mehr anzeigen

1 Kommentar
Daisuke

Thank You For Your and I will make the improvements
:)

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Kein Miniaturbild Entfernen Bitte wähle einen Grund aus Bitte gib die Stelle im Buch an. de de_DE