BookRix

I'm with Felix on this. Ghengis Khan is one of my favorite historical warlords, and I love sci-fi. The writing is tidy, but the story is incomplete. It has to be a complete story to be flash.

I enjoy good historical fiction, and this teaser falls neatly into that "realm". H.F. with a Sci-fi center is more than intriguing!
From what I can see in such a short offering, your characters and scene/mood setting are spot on. The brutal regality of Khan, the fearful respect of Lochi...the aliens, and the divine image they present to a very savage race of invaders.
I think you have a winning voice, as well as an extremely intriguing premise for a novel.
My only "negative" comment is, this doesn't qualify as Flash Fiction ( you are most likely well aware of this as a talented writer). Still, if there were a loophole in the conditions of entry allowing me to do so, I'd gladly vote for it.
Great intro:)