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Sunrise
I haven't written a short story in a while, so I'm just trying to get the hang of it again. I'm not saying anything about the story here, it's too short and doing that would ruin it. Comments would be greatly appreciated!

Stichwörter: 
Sunrise
Beiträge und Kommentare
Wichtiger Beitrag
shyann199

If you just want to make it a short story I would try to put more sentience's together. But if you want a poem, make it a MLA format :]]

4 Kommentare
shyann199

Other than that i really like it. :]]

confusedalarms

i don't understand your first comment, but i'm glad you like it :)

shyann199

lol okay. Your book is kinds choppie, try to put more than one sentences together xD If that helps

confusedalarms

could you give me an example of me not putter sentences together?

Wichtiger Beitrag
bookie00

Man, that is some stuff right there! Certainly a tragedy, but a bitter sweet one.

Wichtiger Beitrag
Gelöschter User

This was very descriptive, and it held my attention 'til the end. However, I must wonder at the purpose of the story. The theme wasn't noticeable, if there was a theme. The last line "There is silence," standing by itself is very effective, but the story itself is lacking purpose.

4 Kommentare
confusedalarms

You're right, there's no purpose

Gelöschter User

This can easily be changed to one that does have a purpose. I'm glad I read it :)

confusedalarms

To be honest, I started out with a totally different plan, then I went 'hey what if..' so it was kind of an impulse thing. I don't think I want to change it, it's kind of a whim, so not really worth the trouble that a poem of mine would be for example. I do put more thought into those.

Gelöschter User

I see. Everyone has their comfort zone.

Wichtiger Beitrag
RevkenR

Loved the story, it is well written. The title however is somewhat misleading. Silence seems a better fit. At least to me.

Or perhaps Sunrise Wave.

Although the title does leave an air of mystery to the story.

1 Kommentar
confusedalarms

deception is key here Ken.

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